3 Ways To Tap Into The Magic of Relationships

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I’ve always been a big believer in what I learned in school: Work hard. Try your best. You’ll succeed.

But that equation left out something really important: Other people.

The simple fact is: we need each other to succeed or at least succeed in an easier way: whether that’s raising a child or creating a business.

No Need To Sing

I don’t mean this in a schmaltzy “High School Musical-We’re All in This Together” sort of way. I mean, in a real way.

No matter how charismatic Oprah is, she wouldn’t be Oprah without a community to inspire. No matter how brilliant Steve Jobs was, he needed a great team to create Apple. And no matter how powerful you are, it’s likely that at some point, you’ll need an exercise buddy, a reliable babysitter or a great hairdresser.

This Isn’t Just Commonsense

It’s written into your DNA. It’s not just your psyche that feels better in relationships, so does your body. That’s why, when you share your feelings with a friend, your immune system gets stronger.

And you don’t even need to know the other person to reap the benefits of relationships.

One man said he combats his speaker’s nerves by imagining everyone in the audience loves him. Even though he knows it isn’t true, he feels it in his heart, and that’s enough to give him the confidence he needs. And science confirms he’s right. If you nervously step up to the podium to give a speech, and there’s one stranger in the audience smiling at you, your blood pressure immediately drops.

Chagall & Me

I think it’s even possible to harness the power of relationships when you’re all alone. I’ve felt it myself while doing something super-solo: browsing through an art museum.

Chagall
Chagall – The Birthday

I used to think that looking at paintings was a solitary-thing, but I’ve realized that it’s not. The truth is, when I look at a painting, I’m meeting an artist who’s showing me his ideas. And because of him, I’m inspired to see the world in a new way.

Your Brain Says Hello

For your survival, your brain is wired to connect: with the people you know, a stranger who smiles at you from the audience or someone who speaks to you through a painting.

As you plan your dreams, whether it’s to write your book, stick to your diet or chart a new course in your life, include other people to help move you along your path—those you know and those you’ve never even met.

3 Ways To Tap Into The Magic of Relationships:

  1. Read biographies of people you admire and be inspired by their stories.
  2. Connect with people who want the things you want, like happy kids, a new business or fitness, and support each other in making that happen.
  3. Look for role models who’ve accomplished what you want and learn from them.

How can you bring the magic of relationships into your life? I’d love to know.

 

Chagall image via WikiPaintings

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About Darlene Mininni

Dr. Darlene Mininni is the author of “The Emotional Toolkit” and creator of UCLA’s undergraduate happiness class LifeSkills. Her work has been featured on CNN, PBS, NPR, WebMD, Marie Claire, SELF and Prevention. Darlene maintains a private mentoring practice dedicated to showing women how to create happy lives by developing their inner wisdom. Follow Darlene on Facebook at Facebook.com/DrDarleneMininni