Category Archives: Inspiration

Start Living Your Life Now

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You’ve finally revved yourself up enough to tell the person you’ve been seeing that you want more from them, when they come back and tell you they aren’t on the same page. What do you do? Continue seeing them even though you know you want more, or are you able to keep looking out for your well-being and gracefully give a kiss on the cheek and say adios?

I was the girl who said one thing and did another. It wasn’t only in romantic relationships but also friendships, agreeing to go to dinner or to a party when I really didn’t want to, or saying I would ask for a raise and then never doing it. Talking about boundaries is easy, but actually drawing them is off-the-charts hard, because it falls on us to do it, it’s our responsibility.

Through a lot of trial and error here’s what I’ve learned along the way. Continue reading

Intent of the Day: Keep the Faith

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All things are inconstant except the faith in the soul,
which changes all things and fills their inconstancy
with light.
-James Joyce

Faith changes everything. It’s easy to be discouraged and it’s easy to give up. People give up everyday and sometimes throwing in the towel is the best option, but today we want to think about the circumstances that require a little faith. These are the circumstances that scare us a little bit, that require a little bit of hope and strength. These are the things that challenge us but ultimately make us stronger and more prepared to tackle the next big vision. We intend to keep the faith!

You too? Here are 3 things to help you do that: Continue reading

We Are Human Beings Not Human Doers

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Getting the BEING back in our DOING for a more fulfilling, happier work, life, balance.

Whoever invented the TO DO list had a great concept, however, knowing the multi-taskers we are, I’m sure it was a woman, but none the less, I bet, she or he didn’t expect our modern day society to take ‘TO DO” to a whole new stratosphere.

Every day we witness women silently drowning in their “To Do Lists”. Beyond this it appears we’ve become a society which is living under a mindset or more bluntly put, the misconception, that constantly “Doing” is the way to justify our existence: to prove to the world and ourselves that our lives are valuable, that we matter and have relevance.  Or should we be asking our self, is it an easy way to avoid the things we don’t want to face and deal with.

As a toddler I was fondly called Dodo by my family, not because I was fascinated by poop or had some special agenda to prove my existence, but because I wanted to explore and do many things for myself and fully experience what was before me at that very moment. In other words, to be fully engaged just as every free spirited toddler is, not at a scheduled time, but to be fully engaged right then and there in the moment. However, as people grow into adulthood so many feel the need to show the world what good “DOERS” they are for some sort of affirmation and to be known for what they DO rather than who they are and the depth of what they’re contributing.

Work, life balance is critical: in other words balancing BEING with your DOING is critical to your success as a “Human Being” on this planet. The majority of American defines success as our careers, but in essence, success is how you approach and live your life in totality as a “whole being” rather than a fragmented one.

Creating a sense of life balance is fundamental to a feeling of overall success and happiness. Balance is achieved with the right blend of BEING versus DOING toward career, community, family and your self.

So how do we practice introducing a little more balance and real connection in our lives so we can become present in our DOING instead of lost in our BEING.

Seven Steps back to being present in your doing Continue reading

Codependency

codep     When I first realized I was a codependent, one of the things that I began to understand was that I lived my life playing the victim.  Everything was always happening TO me, people were always doing harm to me, and I was completely innocent, and the list could go on forever.  I victimized myself, and I wallowed in every bad emotion I had.  Doing this made me lose sight of the good things in life.

Today, I’d like everyone to grab a pen and paper so that we can make gratitude lists.  This is one of the tools that helps me feel good about myself and my life, and it helped reframe the misery I was putting myself in. Continue reading

Why You Should Always Keep Walking

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Nobody ever said life was fair……..

Nobody ever said life was just…….. 

Okay, maybe they did, but they were pretty stupid. 

And they never got anywhere in life.

Truth is, life is not very fair at all.  That’s why we are having revolutions in different parts of the world right now.   

That’s why we have always had revolts ….. throughout the history of mankind.  

Fact is:  Continue reading

Is There One “Best” Type of Temperament? Or Tendency?

thomasmerton“Temperament does not predestine one man to sanctity and another to reprobation. All temperaments can serve as the material for ruin or for salvation…It does not matter how poor or how difficult a temperament we may be endowed with. If we make good use of what we have, if we make it serve our good desires, we can do better than another who merely serves his temperament instead of making it serve him.”

–Thomas Merton, Thoughts in Solitude

This passage from Merton caught my attention, because of my Four Tendencies framework for personality.

In that framework, I divide all of humanity into four types: Upholder, Questioner, Obliger, and Rebel. (Want to find out what you are? The Quiz is here. Almost 500,000 people have taken it.) Continue reading

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Wind blown.

Economic growth is important for the well being of families, communities, and cultures. Economic growth cannot occur without a certain degree of inspiration that leads to innovation. The myth that only certain people are inspired needs to be dispelled, and what needs to be realized is that anyone, regardless of their current state in life can be inspired, express their creativity, and be innovative enough to start something that can blossom and flourish into an entrepreneurial enterprise that not only enhances themselves, rather also it enhances everyone impacted by it. Continue reading

Being Supportive

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When we are choosing the people in our lives, we like to pick ones that comfort us and support us in our times of need. Part of our relationships with these people means supporting them as well. Some of us don’t really know what it means to be supportive, and we do the best we can.

So, what does it mean to be supportive? What can we do to connect with our loved ones better, and help lift them up without any burden to ourselves? Luckily, the answer is quite simple.

Many of us are fixers – we like to solve other people’s problems, lend a hand, and make sure everyone else’s lives are running smoothly. As a fixer myself, I know that more than enough time is spent on these tasks. Living as an adult child of an alcoholic means that I am well versed in the art of fixing, whether it is cleaning up after someone, fixing their mistakes, or bailing them out of trouble when that might not be the best thing for them. Being a fixer is not a bad thing; many of us are caregivers by nature, and we genuinely do love to help out. Being a fixer just means we spend a little too much time focused on fixing others.

Unfortunately, the best intentions can sometimes go astray. We know that we are coming from a loving place or wanting to help and connect with the other person. Constantly telling them how to fix their problems, however, is not what someone wants out of a supportive friend, and we often get pushed away. Continue reading

Soul Questions to Empower Your Intents from Intent.com

Intent.com community is based all over the world.
That means an entire world of experiences, circumstances, hopes and dreams being poured out and more often than not, we find intents that mirror moments we’re experiencing with or without knowing the author.

Today we share our top 10 intents along with soul questions to get your heart and mind pondering in the event you find an intent that feels like your own:

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A great first step towards finding the relationship you want is to know WHAT you want. It will help you prioritize who and what is important.
Are you being the person you want to meet?
Are you saying no to unhealthy relationships and interactions?

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Mildly Medicated: HGH Therapy, Music and the Metamorphosis

Rocky Basile is the compact drumming dynamo behind the sound the Modern Rock Band Mildly Medicated. What do you get when you combine a lead singer with Hemophilia, a guitarist with ADD, a guitarist with diabetes, a bassist with Tourette’s, and a drummer on HGH therapy? You get the modern rock band Mildly Medicated. Against all possible odds, these uniquely talented young musicians from Monmouth County NJ found each other in 2012, all unaware that each of them had medical issues. It was only until they were discussing possible band names that they all realized that they shared a commonality.

Labels – Sometimes the packaging hides what’s really within

I’ve been called them all, midget, dwarf, shrimp, shorty, just to name a few. When a girl Screen Shot 2016-06-24 at 9.34.46 PMwrites in your middle school yearbook “Rocky, you’re my favorite midget in the whole world” it’s hard to find the compliment in that statement. By then I was already one of the best drummers my age in the state of NJ, but that didn’t seem to matter much to people my age. I think that’s one of the things that drew me to drums, other than the fact that I sucked at everything else, was that I sounded big. I mean you could barely see be behind the kit, but there was no question I was there when I stated to play. My beats were loud, angry, attacking, and complex; all the things I wasn’t in physical form.

You see, at age 12 I was diagnosed with a non-functioning pituitary gland, which just happens to be the gland that produces human growth hormone when you sleep. My growth velocity was measured as zero. I was destined to be a little person. Other than being able to park in the handicapped zone, I wasn’t really happy with the prospects of being 4’2″.

My parents gave me two options, one being to break my legs and transplant bone grafts into the gap and put rods through my legs to hold everything in place, or lobby our insurance company for legal human growth hormone, which costs around $5,000 a month. I opted for hormone therapy, and thus we embarked on a two year battle with our health insurance company to get them to pay for it. Their position was I was not sick. Our position was that we wanted them to look at the situation holistically and treat the entire patient, not just an affected area. I would be a happier and healthier person if I was able to grow to a normal height. During this two year battle with them, my internal clock was ticking, and my growth plates would eventually lock up, and no hormone would ever make a difference. I became depressed hearing my father constantly fighting with the insurance company, while trying to hide the pain of labels and the natural abuse you get in school by being the “favorite midget” .

The recluse

Even though we finally won the battle over the insurance company and I was taking daily injections into the flank of my stomach, I threw myself in my music because I could feel the Screen Shot 2016-06-24 at 9.34.59 PMdepression and the anger start to build. School was still problematic, and I had not yet found my voice. My body was changing, some of it for the better, but some not. It’s a funny thing about human growth hormone, it makes everything grow, even the bad stuff inside you. And for me, the bad stuff wanted to make itself known. I developed tumors in my wrists and ankles, which is not great if you’re a drummer, causing me to have multiple surgical procedures. I had just started playing with my band Mildly Medicated, I had just starting feeling like I was accepted and surrounded by people who understood me, and now my drumming career could potentially be over. Continue reading

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