Normally when we discuss intention, it’s about our internal directive and how we want to achieve something. Whether that is being more loving, maintaining balance in our lives, or practicing patience; it’s very easy to understand our own objectives. But what about when it comes to others?
For instance, what about the driver who cuts you off in traffic? Do you believe they’re being aggressive? Or the person who repeatedly kicks the back of your seat in a movie theater or airplane? Are they being deliberately annoying?
How we interpret another’s intention actually reveals more about ourselves than them. The stories we fabricate of what we’re observing, can be subtle but rampant. Yet this is the cognitive energy we lug around when we unconsciously follow these unexplored guesses that usually result in lashing, negative and superficial judgments. Continue reading →
Many spiritual teachers and traditions teach about the power of being present in the moment. By cultivating an egoless state, they claim that you can find great joy and happiness in life. The problem is, many teachers don’t explain how to experience egolessness outside of years of contemplative practice. Meditation is an important process of self-actualization, but doesn’t always translate into the everyday world.
While developing a deep, empathic listening skill as part of my work as a peacemaker, I suddenly experienced non-ego for about 15 seconds. It was remarkable because I felt exactly as the teachers said I would. Nothing could touch me, and I was experiencing a deep connection while completely conscious. Even more startling, I was in the process of de-escalating a very angry person.
Standing in the midst of intense conflict, I found Oneness. Since then, I have perfected teaching the skill so that anyone can learn how to do it. Here are the steps you need to take to experience this for yourself. Continue reading →
“What you experienced in life, those feelings of trying to please everyone and, in reality, pleasing no one and certainly not pleasing yourself, that’s something that so many of us, women in particular, experience.”
Who am I?
What do I want?
How can I serve?
Mallika shares with Joan Herrmann of Change Your Attitude, Change Your Life that while growing up, her father taught her and her brother to focus on and ask for the things that will ultimately lead to a richer life- happiness, love, connection, versus the things we usually attribute with material wealth and security. These questions have been important regardless of the stage whether that be while she was a child or first settling into a career, becoming a mom or launching a brand new business. Continue reading →
You have likely heard the old adage that holding onto anger is like holding onto hot coals with the intent of throwing them at someone else. The importance of forgiving others, while not always easy, is one we learn as a part of understanding compassion. We practice forgiveness as a component to understanding mercy, grace and kindness.
We’ve seen the effects of guilt and shame. We’ve also seen the effects of being unforgiving on a person who’s been wronged. No one wants to wake up and realize they’re the bitter, angry person who couldn’t let go and couldn’t move on from even some of the worst hurts. No one wants to know they let someone else control their decisions and freeze their lives in a terrible moment, unable to break free and move forward in freedom. But what about when we are the person at fault? What do we do when the finger of blame is point straight at ourselves? Continue reading →
At the level of consciousness or spirit, we are all inextricably connected to everyone and everything.While our body may appear to be a solid physical structure, in reality it’s an ever-flowing river of energy and information, in constant dynamic exchange with the environment around us.
Our language reflects our innate understanding of our essential energetic nature. We say things like, “His words really resonated with me,” or “I got a bad vibe from that person,” or “My friend has such aradiant heart.” These aren’t just metaphors—we really do feel each other’s energy and are affected by it at a profound level. Think of all the qualities in another person you intuitively pick up at an energetic level. Besides telling if someone is happy or sad, you can sense whether they feel peaceful or perturbed. Looking into their eyes reveals alertness or dullness, tenderness, or indifference. It’s hard to think of any human quality that doesn’t have a kind of energy “signature.”
As energetic beings, our potential to affect others with our energy or state of being is both a great gift and a great responsibility. When we walk into a room, our energy emanates from us. Without saying a word, we communicate through our energetic signature, creating a ripple that can affect everyone we meet. If our state of being is centered in love and compassion, we communicate that energy to each other. In the same way, if we’re mired in judgment, hostility, or resentment, we communicate that too.
Through our energy or consciousness, we have an unlimited capacity to send out ripples that will help the planet and its inhabitants move in the most evolutionary direction—from fear, hostility, and unrest to love, compassion, peace, and joy. Continue reading →
Loss has also reminded me to have gratitude and be present with those we love if we have the opportunity to do so. In my 40’s, many people I love have transitioned, and I have seen family and friends lose their parents, spouses, even children, to disease or senseless tragedy. My intent to spend time with loved ones is a priority for me.Continue reading →
Xan you remember the people you saw this morning on your walk from your house to your car? From your car to your office or into the grocery store? While we are aware that there are other humans crossing our paths, we don’t always notice who they are or what they’re doing.
Joyce Torrefrance, a student from the Philippines, shared this post of a child she passed on the street who appeared to be studying at a makeshift desk on the street. With further investigation, news outlets were able to identify the child as 9 year old Daniel Cabrera who studied on the street as his mom Christina Espinosa worked in a shop nearby. Since the loss of her husband 2 years ago and her home to a fire 5 years ago, Espinosa has worked hard to provide for herself and her three children. Continue reading →
Our most negative encounters can sometimes offer us great spiritual guidance. For instance, I once had a blow-out fight with a woman at a car rental counter. She felt the need to flaunt her power and go out of her way to make things difficult for me. My reac
tion was no better than her outburst. I felt the need to respond with my own power play by threatening to call her manager and make a complaint. And I did just that.
Hours after stating my claim to her corporate office and regional manager, I felt no better. I thought that complaining about how poorly I was treated would help me get over the experience. Instead, it made me feel worse. I sat with this and explored what the lesson was for me. In stillness, I heard my inner voice recite one of Yogi Bhajan’s five sutras for the Aquarian age: “Recognize the other person is you.” I was floored by my inner guide—the message was so clear and resonant.
I went on to explore what it was about this angry customer service rep that reflected me. I came to realize that her behavior was merely mirroring a disowned part of my own shadow. In silent contemplation I was able to accept that deep down there was a part of me that wanted to control the situation and the outcome. This was the same quality the customer-service representative had. Her deep-rooted need to be in control came head-to-head with my need to be in control.
Teens. Social media. Spirituality. Staying connected.
They are just some of the many things parents encounter when raising children and it can be overwhelming and messy.
Recently, Mallika Chopra had the opportunity to sit down with the Kids in the House team to share her experiences and wisdom gained from raising two young daughters. They filmed a short series of videos to encourage parents who are parenting teens through stress, spirituality and social media. Continue reading →