“What you experienced in life, those feelings of trying to please everyone and, in reality, pleasing no one and certainly not pleasing yourself, that’s something that so many of us, women in particular, experience.”
Who am I?
What do I want?
How can I serve?
Mallika shares with Joan Herrmann of Change Your Attitude, Change Your Life that while growing up, her father taught her and her brother to focus on and ask for the things that will ultimately lead to a richer life- happiness, love, connection, versus the things we usually attribute with material wealth and security. These questions have been important regardless of the stage whether that be while she was a child or first settling into a career, becoming a mom or launching a brand new business. Continue reading →
Many people ask me if I am in a better place after writing the book. I can categorically say yes! I am happy and healthy and feeling fulfilled – a good place to be. I made some major changes in my lifestyle that, while still inconsistent at times, have become part of my daily habits. Meditation has been more regular. Exercise and sugar, well, lets say the journey remains messy.
This morning, my last day of being 43, I had to go to the DMV to renew my license. In my sleep last night, I remembered that I had got a notice two months ago that I had to go before July 24th when it expired, and take an eye test, give my fingerprints, and take a new photo.I had an hour waiting with nothing to do so started scribbling notes for my intents this year.
You have likely heard the old adage that holding onto anger is like holding onto hot coals with the intent of throwing them at someone else. The importance of forgiving others, while not always easy, is one we learn as a part of understanding compassion. We practice forgiveness as a component to understanding mercy, grace and kindness.
We’ve seen the effects of guilt and shame. We’ve also seen the effects of being unforgiving on a person who’s been wronged. No one wants to wake up and realize they’re the bitter, angry person who couldn’t let go and couldn’t move on from even some of the worst hurts. No one wants to know they let someone else control their decisions and freeze their lives in a terrible moment, unable to break free and move forward in freedom. But what about when we are the person at fault? What do we do when the finger of blame is point straight at ourselves? Continue reading →
At the level of consciousness or spirit, we are all inextricably connected to everyone and everything.While our body may appear to be a solid physical structure, in reality it’s an ever-flowing river of energy and information, in constant dynamic exchange with the environment around us.
Our language reflects our innate understanding of our essential energetic nature. We say things like, “His words really resonated with me,” or “I got a bad vibe from that person,” or “My friend has such aradiant heart.” These aren’t just metaphors—we really do feel each other’s energy and are affected by it at a profound level. Think of all the qualities in another person you intuitively pick up at an energetic level. Besides telling if someone is happy or sad, you can sense whether they feel peaceful or perturbed. Looking into their eyes reveals alertness or dullness, tenderness, or indifference. It’s hard to think of any human quality that doesn’t have a kind of energy “signature.”
As energetic beings, our potential to affect others with our energy or state of being is both a great gift and a great responsibility. When we walk into a room, our energy emanates from us. Without saying a word, we communicate through our energetic signature, creating a ripple that can affect everyone we meet. If our state of being is centered in love and compassion, we communicate that energy to each other. In the same way, if we’re mired in judgment, hostility, or resentment, we communicate that too.
Through our energy or consciousness, we have an unlimited capacity to send out ripples that will help the planet and its inhabitants move in the most evolutionary direction—from fear, hostility, and unrest to love, compassion, peace, and joy. Continue reading →
Loss has also reminded me to have gratitude and be present with those we love if we have the opportunity to do so. In my 40’s, many people I love have transitioned, and I have seen family and friends lose their parents, spouses, even children, to disease or senseless tragedy. My intent to spend time with loved ones is a priority for me.Continue reading →
How many spent on “you time” or wrangling kids or making dinner?
Where did the whole day go?
Sometimes our days are a cyclone at best. If we made it out alive, it’s cause for celebration. The trouble when we stay in a perpetual survival mode. We live constantly like we’re barely squeaking by- grab the cookie from the office kitchen since there’s not a second for lunch! Send one more email from bed! “What is this lady’s name?! I know I’ve met her before!!” Continue reading →
Xan you remember the people you saw this morning on your walk from your house to your car? From your car to your office or into the grocery store? While we are aware that there are other humans crossing our paths, we don’t always notice who they are or what they’re doing.
Joyce Torrefrance, a student from the Philippines, shared this post of a child she passed on the street who appeared to be studying at a makeshift desk on the street. With further investigation, news outlets were able to identify the child as 9 year old Daniel Cabrera who studied on the street as his mom Christina Espinosa worked in a shop nearby. Since the loss of her husband 2 years ago and her home to a fire 5 years ago, Espinosa has worked hard to provide for herself and her three children. Continue reading →
Our most negative encounters can sometimes offer us great spiritual guidance. For instance, I once had a blow-out fight with a woman at a car rental counter. She felt the need to flaunt her power and go out of her way to make things difficult for me. My reac
tion was no better than her outburst. I felt the need to respond with my own power play by threatening to call her manager and make a complaint. And I did just that.
Hours after stating my claim to her corporate office and regional manager, I felt no better. I thought that complaining about how poorly I was treated would help me get over the experience. Instead, it made me feel worse. I sat with this and explored what the lesson was for me. In stillness, I heard my inner voice recite one of Yogi Bhajan’s five sutras for the Aquarian age: “Recognize the other person is you.” I was floored by my inner guide—the message was so clear and resonant.
I went on to explore what it was about this angry customer service rep that reflected me. I came to realize that her behavior was merely mirroring a disowned part of my own shadow. In silent contemplation I was able to accept that deep down there was a part of me that wanted to control the situation and the outcome. This was the same quality the customer-service representative had. Her deep-rooted need to be in control came head-to-head with my need to be in control.