I chose to end 2008 by taking and teaching at a silent meditation retreat in the desert with the Agape community. This was one of the best choices I made in 2008.The retreat was sold out and I had to have a roomate – not my choice but it was part of my practice to embrace the unknown.
My roomate was sweet and did her best to honor me as I did her but there were definately awkward moments. I arrived after her and she took the bed further away from the door – my time to practice acceptance. it was a blessing to witness my growth from my past blindspots of being pissed off – and moved into gratitude for having a cottage with only 2 of us instead of beign with 8 or 10 people.
I had to teach during the retreat and my sleep and time was important to me (as I am sure to her) so I could give my best to the community. Our first sitting was at 6am and we both had to get up to shower and be on time. I let my roomate know that I was getting up at 5 to be there 10 min before. She then shared that she wanted to get there 20 min before to save a spot in the front – touched on one of my blindspots of not thinking of others when sharing space, but I have been working on compromise. Good news it did work out. I was able to suggest her getting up at 5:45 am to have time to make it but I pressed a button and one of her blindspots was revealed. She quickly reacted and said, "She had a problem with her thyroid and could not get up in the morning." I said, "Ok, well what are we to do, I am sure it will work out."
I was already fired up to be there and after the long drive and being right near an energy vortex there was little sleep to be had. As I began to go to sleep she jumped up and said, " Ok I will go for it". I chimed in, "Great". Well she did it and also saved me a spot which was amazing of her. But I still was wishing I had my own room as the night was restless she snoored and I kept clearing my throat for her to stop. She did mention I was talking in my sleep so we were both sleep deprivied. I did feel a bit bad and had to let it go and embrace her difference and expression. But her mention of her thyroid as a "problem that was messing up her life" stuck in my mind all day.
She came to the yoga class and we were trying to gel with understanding. Later that night I got to the cottage and I had was a flash of insight to ask her about her thryroid condition. I was not completly sure but I knew my asking would help in some way. I followed the impulse to ask and said, "Please tell me what is happening with your thyroid". Her eyes lit up and she shared that she had this "problem" and she could not wake up and went on to talk about it as if it was a serpent taking her life away from her.
I quickly said, "It is not a problem but an invitation to heal." She got it and was grateful to see she was not helping herself and blaming this diagnosis for her shifting in life. She did not realize the blind spot and was amazed at herself that it was there. Very cool when we have realizations and the light shines on the very area that we think is a problem but in turn a gift.
I shared some resources with her and ideas and there was some peace with us. Then I asked her to embrace her health issue with her thyroid as part of her process to heal and to use the resources to help empower her and assist in her evolution.
I have learned that there are no real "problems" in life, but new ways to heal, grow and become more ourselves. See the problems, blindspots as opportunites and a road map to healing.
I am grateful for my process to be able to help others. I know my blindspots come up and it takes others to see what I cannot and this can sometimes be painful or even invigorating to step into the truth.
Notice if you are seeing parts of your life as a problem, situations as a problem, or some health condition as a problem that is holding you from living your life more fully. This label could be a blindspot as you may be blaming something outside that has to be healed from the inside. Be honest and kind with yourself in the process.
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May we all shine light onto our blindspots as we shift into our new paradigm 09!
Yes, I also believe that it can be helpful when others shine a light on our blindspots.
In Aikido training, we give our partners physical feedback by how we respond. If the partner is centered and flowing, we are easily moved. Otherwise, they are likely to run into our resistance.
Similarly, if I listen carefully to how people respond to me in any situation, I can learn a great deal about my own state of being. A program called Nonviolent Communication (www.cnvc.org) offers wonderful training in being able to notice how our words affect others.
In my marriage, and my work with other couples, I continue to discover how powerful a mirror we are for each other. We can shine light not only on our partner's blindspots, but also upon what is best. When love is reflected back and forth, magic is created and the relationship is transformed.
I'm also a fellow Agape member and I attend on Wednesdays, it sounds like the NY's retreat was a success, I could only wish to have been in such an intimate setting with our beloved Rev Michael and Rev Rikki, i'm glad you have a good time.
Hugs, Lily
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