I’m going to teach you a key technique that will transform your relationship with your dog. Even if you did nothing else, this technique would make a measurable difference in your connection. It’s called "pushing".
In our last article, we talked about how to use Tug-of-War to help your dog get more comfortable interacting with you at higher and higher levels of energy. You want to become "The Moose" in your dog’s life – so that whenever something in the world energizes your dog, they know that YOU are the one uniquely capable of helping them resolve that energy.
What you need is a way (or ways) to teach your dog that they can safely interact with YOU at higher and higher levels of energy. When you think about it, it’s easy to have an obedient, happy dog when things are calm and there’s nothing distracting going on. But it’s much more difficult when things get "exciting". In those moments, when your dog is responding EMOTIONALLY to their environment, you need to have the kind of emotional connection with your dog that attracts your dog with even greater force the more charged up they get. Enter pushing.
Also, since most dogs living in a human world have little-to-no opportunity to release the emotional stress stored within, you need a way to get deep into your dog’s emotional battery, to help your dog learn how to relax and let the energy of life flow through them. The technique of pushing also allows your dog to resolve that stress, with you. Since stored stress and an inability to physically relax in highly energized moments is at the root of most problem behavior in dogs, you will be able to directly affect any undesirable behaviors that you’re experiencing with your dog by giving them a reliable outlet for that stress.
How to push with your dog
The concept of pushing is pretty simple, but it requires two hands, so you’ll have to put down the crackberry. You call your dog’s name, feed your dog a handful of food with one hand, and use your other hand to push against your dog’s chest to create some resistance. Here’s what you’ll need:
- A Hungry Dog. Often when I start teaching a dog how to push, I’ll skip dinner the night before, and then use a dog’s breakfast the next morning to do the pushing. Your dog’s hunger will help them overcome the resistance that they naturally feel towards interacting with you so directly as the energy level increases. That and…
- VERY tasty food. A good strategy is to take a meal-sized portion of your dog’s kibble and add some hot water – not to turn it into a mush, but to soften it and make it more flavorful. Then I’ll add some diced-up all-natural hot dog, or chicken, or essentially whatever it takes to make the food as delectable as possible.
- A food pouch – something really easy to get your hand into and out of with handfuls of food. I use a single-pocket nail pouch from the hardware store – a large fanny pack will work well too.
Be prepared to get dirty, from dog paws and food residue, so wear play clothes. You want your dog to be as uninhibited as possible, so wear something that will allow you to be uninhibited as well. It takes a while to get the hang of it, so be patient with yourself and your dog, and advance very gradually in this exercise. Head outdoors, and hook your dog up on a long leash (which you can let drag on the ground, but which you can also grab if your dog decides to head for the hills).
Start by simply feeding your dog by hand. You might need to get your dog used to being fed by hand, so first offer the treat without providing any resistance, and add some praise in a relaxing tone of voice. Then back away a step or two and use the food to encourage your dog to come to you. Never, and I mean never, move towards your dog during the pushing exercise. Again, this is perhaps contrary to everything you’ve ever read and heard about dogs, but it is a critical element of becoming more attractive and prey-like in your dog’s eyes. It also makes it easier for your dog to approach you in a state of high-energy and drive. Encouraging your dog to chase you is fine – but don’t chase your dog.
Next, start calling your dog’s name in an eager, excited tone as you offer the food to them.
Once your dog is reliably taking steps toward you for food, it’s time to incorporate your pushing hand. Keep it very gentle at first, just to get them used to the sensation of your hand, adding a little massage while your dog gets the treat from your food hand. Your initial goal should simply be to soften the muscles of your dog’s face, neck, and chest with your massaging. You want to do the massaging at the same time that you’re feeding.
As your dog gets used to this, continue to back away a few steps, call your dog’s name, tempt with the food, and praise. Provide contact with your other hand against your dog’s neck and chest. You might notice at this point that your dog provides some counter-pressure, leaning in and pushing against you as you massage. If so, give your dog an "A", because this is exactly what you want. If not, add some minor, deliberate pressure against your dog’s chest/neck, and feel for your dog’s push back. Then release the push and let your dog have the food.
(if you compare this picture with the picture of this same golden up above, you can see that he’s now leaning in towards me in response to VERY subtle pressure that I’m applying against his chest)
The push/release cycle is much like the tug/release cycle of tug-of-war. You want to encourage your dog to push against you, build up the tension of the push, and then give your dog the RELEASE of getting the food in your food hand (at which point the pushing stops). If your dog backs away or stops pushing before you’ve released the food, then you probably pushed too long (or too hard) – so use that as feedback for the next time you push. You should develop a sensitivity to how much "push" your dog is willing to give you, and "zing" them with the food just before they reach their threshold. Think of it as if your dog is lifting weights for the heart muscle – you want to give you dog just enough resistance to challenge them, but not so much that it overwhelms them.
Be sensitive
As you push, you should constantly be feeling the situation and matching the level of push that your dog is giving you. Ultimately, you want your dog to really be driving towards you for the food, eventually even pushing so hard that the front paws come up off the ground as you move backwards, away from your dog. Practice moving backwards while you maintain the contact of the push with your dog.
After every few pushes, take a break to relax your dog with some slow, deep massage over their entire body. Massage breaks help your dog develop physical relaxation as a counterpoint to the emotional intensity of the pushing exercise.
Change things up
Call your dog’s name and then run away, encouraging your dog to chase you – then spin around for a push with your dog. Grab a tug toy and start a game of tug, let your dog win, and then go back to pushing. If you’re walking in the woods with your dog and a friend, have your friend hold your dog – then run off down the trail and hide behind a tree. Call your dog, and watch your dog "hunt" for you – rewarding your dog with enthusiastic praise and some pushing when they reach you.
A new routine
Every mealtime gives you an opportunity to work with your dog, so rather than just putting your dog’s food in their dish, make it tasty, put it in a pouch, and head outside to do some pushing. You’ll be giving your dog a great emotional workout, along with giving some structure to the new dynamic between the two of you.
Pushing, and other techniques we’ll cover in the future, help you bond with your dog as well as help them cope with their energy before it becomes stress. At all times during these games, remember to stay as relaxed as possible. Keep breathing. Have fun. Praise your dog often. Offer your dog encouragement and keep yourself open to your dog’s other cues from moment to moment – good training for life! Soon I’ll show you how to use pushing to turn your dog’s attraction to other things out in the environment into even more attraction to YOU.
If you’d like more thorough instruction on how to push, I cover it in even greater detail in this article about pushing on my website. I also give thorough step-by-step video instructions on how to push, along with many intermediate and advanced Natural Dog Training techniques on my 2-DVD set, Natural Dog Training: The Fundamentals.
Neil Sattin is the author of www.naturaldogblog.com a website devoted transforming your relationship with your dog (and yourself) with a centered, nonviolent, and radically different way of training. He released "Natural Dog Training: The Fundamentals", an instructional 2-DVD set that teaches his methods. Neil lives with his wife, two children, three cats, and, of course, his dog Nola outside of Portland, Maine.
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