Children extend our identities and so we bask in their accomplishments. The opposite is also true. Many of the stressors we encounter daily are triggered or exacerbated by what our children experience: social interactions, tests, sports and of course, their moods. As parents, we set out with the goal to make our children’s world more stable, healthier and joyous. Somehow along the way we try too hard and get lost in multi-tasking. The new school year presents an opportunity for a fresh start, getting together with old and new friends, new accomplishments and exciting activities – a measure of growth. A new vibration can be felt in the air.
When we feel stressed about our children’s conflicts and situations, they inhale that stress and sense their own negativity more intensely, fearing the problem to be far worse and more unmanageable than it is. The problem with school, any level from pre-school to college, is labeling. Children wear their scarlet letter grades as badges of honor or shame. Also, they are ranked according to popularity. Once a child is labeled, expectations seem to fall in line with that label. Children might experience stomachaches, headaches, insomnia and more frequent colds because of stress: “How can I measure up? How can I change my label?"
The start of a new school year provides an opportunity for a new spiritual beginning, a change in perception. At this very moment parents need to create a home environment conducive to empowerment and the philosophy of the little engine that could. Parents need to choose to see their children in a positive light. Affirm them even in thoughts because children are mind readers. So, if your child does not get the lead in the play, don’t look at him or her with anxious eyes. Instead listen to what your child is really saying: “Mom, I was chosen to clap and cheer in the audience.”
Here are some suggestions to give your child a successful head start:
* To help your child tune into his or her verbal intelligence read to your child and encourage reading; discuss the story with your child. Create your own book club at home or with other parents. Everyday prepare a new word of the day for your child to learn. Encourage your child to use it in conversation. Play word games. Match up opposites.
* To help your child become more logical and develop a mathematical intelligence play games like cards, dominoes and construct with building sets; do puzzles, get a science kit for simple do-at-home experiments and show your child a new world through a microscope for a different perspective.
* To help your child become more natural and self-expressive develop his or her ability to recognize and categorize nature, the seasonal changes, plants and animals. Point out the names of the plants in your garden or park. Collect specimens from your neighborhood and create showcases for your child’s personal natural history “museum.” Point out the emotional and physical relationships to weather changes; create a weather calendar.
* To help generate more quiet time and access to personal feelings, give your child some down time alone. Don’t shuttle him or her from activity to activity. Free play without batteries or videos is wonderful for developing creativity. Children need to learn to amuse themselves too! In other words, boredom can be a good thing.
* Help your child become more artistic by taking him or her to musical performances, plays, or children’s museums to observe brushstrokes, colors and textures. Sing in the car with your child. If there is interest, encourage your child to play a musical instrument or take painting classes. Listen to the birds sing with your child. Suggest that your child make up a song, poem or story.
* Create hope and patience in your child by daydreaming together out loud. Plant seeds and watch them grow. Give your child a pet to take care of.
* To develop physical abilities, strength and personal empowerment let your child learn how to swim, dance, do martial arts, yoga, gymnastics, play tennis, soccer etc. Encourage your child to sample many activities to develop agility and goal direction as well as to become a team player. As he or she gets older, your child can cultivate a specific sport .
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