How to Receive a Massage

Ask any therapist and they’ll tell you about the hoards of people who don’t know how to receive a massage. For your own enjoyment, here are five things to keep in mind the next time you find yourself on the table:

1. Don’t help! Your job is to lie there like a wet noodle. If we massage therapists need you to lift your head or move your leg, we’ll ask. Most of the time, however, we prefer that you allow us to lift and move your body without your assistance. We want you to relax your muscles as we work on them, not tense them up. And many times we like to use the force of gravity and the weight of your body parts to help us achieve a therapeutic goal. Here’s a simple test: If a therapist lifts your arm up off the table, and then lets it go, does it fall back onto the table, or are you still holding it up in the air? Hmm… you know who you are …

2. Relax in silence. There’s no need to try to have a conversation with us, and quite frankly, it’s easier for us to concentrate on what we’re doing if we don’t have to engage you in dialogue. Let your attention go inward. Relax, enjoy the sensations, be in the moment. Feel the massage. That doesn’t mean, however, that you shouldn’t say something if you’re uncomfortable. Which leads me to #3…

3. Speak up if you need anything. If you’re unhappy with the way the massage is unfolding, please tell us what you don’t like about it and/or what you’d prefer. If something we’re doing hurts, makes you feel uncomfortable or uneasy, please say something. Many times I’ve found that when people are feeling discomfort, instead of saying something verbally they’ll squirm or change facial expressions. Body language isn’t as obvious as saying how you’re feeling out loud. Verbal communication is the best, most efficient way to alert your therapist that you’d like her or him to change a behavior.

4. Watch your caffeine intake. Showing up for your massage amped up after having ingested a large coffee won’t help you to relax. You’ll probably be very antsy and wish you hadn’t wasted your time and money on the massage. (Trust me, I’ve done it.)

5. Keep it clean. Don’t ask for sex. It’s not appropriate. (For heaven’s sake, people! Those days are long gone.) If you want to pay for sex, go see a sex worker. And I’m afraid this also needs to be said: for your own comfort, show up with a clean body. Do you really want your therapist to oil up your dirty feet and then drag the dirt all over the rest of your body? Whenever I get a massage, at the very least, I wash my feet in the bathroom before I get on the table, because I know that whatever I’ve walked in could end up on my face.