Patience and perseverance
have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish.
-John Quincy Adams
These are tough times. It is hard to know the difference between what is real and what is propaganda, what requires our full attention and what is just distracting noise, what is truth and what is the fear of what-if. So what will disarm this fear? What is the best way to combat the anger? Will we fight fire with fire and will anything be left standing after the fire storm? Today our intent is to address conflict with patience.
How do we do that? Here are 3 things to help:
- Battling at the workplace? We love these 5 keys to dealing with job conflict, from Forbes
Your workplace is a setting where you don’t get to choose every person with which you’re interacting. So what do you do when things are not going smoothly? How do you put yourself in a position to create harmony or know when it call it quits? We loved how Forbes walked through the dynamics flying in a work conflict and how to slow it all down.
- These wise words from Eckhart Tolle about seeing yourself as part of the bigger picture as a key to finding happiness
In all forms of conflict, we battle against how someone else’s opinion paints ourselves. When someone is upset about XYZ, how does it reflect how they feel about me? A major element in conflict involves the “me” in the picture and when we can start to identify the “me” in others and separate the “me” from their argument, imagine the change that could happen!
- These ideas on how changing your fighting style can take the steam out of a battle, from TED
Are you the type that runs full force into a fight? Do you shy away from it? Rather than running away from or blowing the lid off a disagreement, we can consider a new posture for how we enter those circumstances. How can we be the person we hope shows up for the fight? By that we mean, if we hope for vulnerability and patience, let us model vulnerability and patience rather than expect it from the other person and offer none of our own. What if we’re dealing with someone who is the opposite of those things? That doesn’t absolve you from being an honorable human. Be the person you hope to meet. This may be the first time your “opponent” is coming into contact with a person who can communicate patiently and logically. This may be the conflict that begins the process of their own change. You can only be responsible for yourself, so what self will you bring to the table? Make it a good one.