Intent of the Day: Conflict with Patience


Patience and perseverance
have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish.
-John Quincy Adams

These are tough times. It is hard to know the difference between what is real and what is propaganda, what requires our full attention and what is just distracting noise, what is truth and what is the fear of what-if. So what will disarm this fear? What is the best way to combat the anger? Will we fight fire with fire and will anything be left standing after the fire storm? Today our intent is to address conflict with patience.

How do we do that? Here are 3 things to help:


  • These wise words from Eckhart Tolle about seeing yourself as part of the bigger picture as a key to finding happiness

    In all forms of conflict, we battle against how someone else’s opinion paints ourselves. When someone is upset about XYZ, how does it reflect how they feel about me? A major element in conflict involves the “me” in the picture and when we can start to identify the “me” in others and separate the “me” from their argument, imagine the change that could happen!


  • These ideas on how changing your fighting style can take the steam out of a battle, from TED
    Are you the type that runs full force into a fight? Do you shy away from it? Rather than running away from or blowing the lid off a disagreement, we can consider a new posture for how we enter those circumstances. How can we be the person we hope shows up for the fight? By that we mean, if we hope for vulnerability and patience, let us model vulnerability and patience rather than expect it from the other person and offer none of our own. What if we’re dealing with someone who is the opposite of those things? That doesn’t absolve you from being an honorable human. Be the person you hope to meet. This may be the first time your “opponent” is coming into contact with a person who can communicate patiently and logically. This may be the conflict that begins the process of their own change. You can only be responsible for yourself, so what self will you bring to the table? Make it a good one.