Life happens on a need-to-know basis.
At first, this can seem frustrating, but it is actually an incredible gift. Life gives us exactly what we need in each moment throughout our day to lead us exactly where we need to go and, thus experience exactly what we need to experience. This is much more than simply a "nice idea" in my opinion. As you comprehend the profundity of this, it can help you navigate any challenges with greater wisdom, added grace, and more finesse.
The mind wants to know why things happen the way they do. This is especially true when there is pain and suffering involved:
“Why am I being subject to this torture?”
“Have I done something to deserve this?”
“Why did he have an affair on me?”
“Why did she leave me?”
“Why did I lose all my money?”
“Why do I have to suffer so much?”
“Why did he get that promotion and not me?”
“Why did she get all of the attention when we were growing up?”
The mind repeatedly asks “why” when the event is happening, and you probably won’t know the answer right away. This is especially true when you are going through painful and tough times: those times in life where everything seems to implode around you, leaving you feeling overwhelmed, lost, and utterly confused.
During these times, it is helpful to trust in the process as much as possible. Hold onto the idea that there is a reason – that the universe has a reason – and that you just may not know what it is in this moment. The reason you think might not be the "ultimate reason." Just keep trusting that the universe is leading you perfectly. It has been leading you perfectly all along.
If you think you are suffering because "God hates you" or because you did something terribly wrong or because you are a bad person, or because you are somehow "unworthy" of greatness in life, entertain the idea that this interpretation may not be the final reason (even though it feels real). The final explanation for the experience might, in fact, turn out to be something other than you initially suspected.
I recall a well-known poem from my childhood by a n anonymous author. (As a personal aside, I remember this is actually where I learned what the word anonymous meant! I was very young, maybe seven years old or so.) This poem involved a person asking God why God had abandoned her when she was at her lowest point, leaving her to fend for herself, when God had promised that he/she would be there with her always. She said “Why was there only one set of foot prints during this tragic time in my life?” God’s response to her was “When there is only one set of footprints, it is because I carried you.”
So during those times where you feel absolutely alone or abandoned, remind yourself that this tough and difficult time, too, shall pass. And when it does, you might be absolutely amazed and astounded by the perfection of the process. What you think is your worst hell might turn out in fact to be your most exquisite heaven. Your worst suffering might turn out to be your greatest bliss.
The important factor is simply to "stay in the game" and remain open to the possibilities. Life happens on a need-to-know basis. When you need to know more, the universe will provide you with more input. The mind may want to know why right now, but the universe has its own timing.
Trust that when you need to know, you will know. This trust will help you align your preferences and desires with the universe’s preferences and desires. When this happens, everything that shows up in your life is a gift, and gratitude is the immediate and only response.
This article is the first in a two-part series on How Life Happens on a Need-to-know Basis.
Sarah Maria is the author of Love Your Body, Love Your Life. The book outlines her 5-step process for helping you feel great in and about your body and yourself. Click here to purchase your copy and begin to love your body today. To learn more about Sarah Maria and her work, you can visit her website at www.sarahmaria.com and www.breakfreebeauty.com.
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