I never knew Michael Jackson personally but like many of you, felt I knew him because of his lyrics and my love of his music. When I was a young girl growing up I worshipped him. I wanted to sing like him, dance like him, be as famous as him. I loved how he expressed himself through words and with his body. He seemed so free to be himself.
As time went on and he changed his appearance and his demeanor became more inward, I realized he was far from free. In fact, he was living in a different world. Like many celebrities (and his world was of the most extreme) he had no privacy and no way to be normal. I’m sure many of the things we think are boring–going grocery shopping, taking a walk in the park–are things a celebrity cannot do without being mobbed.
I’m sure that his fame and fortune were a great part of how his life took different turns. I will admit that while he changed his face and hair and then was charged with the inappropriate behavior with children, I did judge him. I can’t say I thought he for sure did what he was charged with, I just lost respect for him. I didn’t understand where he was going with his life so I judged instead of questioned for a period of time.
My brother Rod killed himself years ago. He shot himself in the head and I got the news and had to tell my parents. I tell you this because this event changed my life and it also helped me to become less judgmental.
Rod was like Michael in one way: he was a soul that had a hard time living in this world. It hurt Rod deeply to see pain and suffering around him in the world. If someone didn’t have clothes or a decent jacket, Rod would take his own off and hand it to the person. Rod was more comfortable when alone or with animals. He was artistic. He loved music with a passion. It was hard for Rod to be with others. He was this beautiful soul who just found it tough to go along with societies rules and expectations. He wanted wars to end and freedom and love for all of us.
I don’t know but I wonder if Michael was a soul who just found it hard to be here and not be free.
What I do believe is that he is free now. I believe his soul is flying in peace and love and acceptance. Fly Michael, Fly!
Allison,
I commend you on writing such an honest blog. I too loved Michael's music, thou felt like you I did judge him, and thought he was guilty of what they charged him with. Once someone has passed, I feel it's time to look at the positive in their life.
I'll come back to your blog here, and will read it again, again. It's a change to read true feelings, open without concern what others will think. I hope your book written with your husband is available at our local library. I would love to read your book.
Thank you for sharing with us.
Kevin Keath
Watseka, Illinois
Wonderful post Allison and I felt as you do about Michael. I loved his music and so did my mother and others.
This phobia Americans has about adults not sleeping in the same bed with children not their own is just that. This overwhelming fear is exhibited mainly in the USA and begs the question "what is at the root of it". But that's another story altogether.
Michael was a beautiful and tortured soul. I always thought so. However, he made the transition peacefully and since I believe in reincarnation, I'm sure he's already being nurtured in another little body born the day he died.
I have some experience with suicide as well so I understand exactly where you're coming from.
Peace!