Wordplay Wednesday: One In The Same

braided rop
Maybe it was naïve
Of me to assume
It would be safe
To express myself
What I’ve experienced
And felt
Maybe my enthusiasm
Took me too far
The energy and relief
I got
From breaking
The silence
From letting go
Of my desire
To control
What you and you
Knew about me
I was just trying to be
Fully integrated
To hold my head high
And not care
What you think
I didn’t mean to make
Anyone uncomfortable
I was just trying to
Be
And now
To my disappointment
I’m realizing
It’s not quite
That easy
That I need to set
Boundaries
For my creativity
And I wish so badly
That I didn’t have to
Compartmentalize
And filter
What I say and do
I know I’m not perfect
But how boring
That would be
And honestly
Who is?
I’ve demonstrated
That I find solutions
No matter what
The challenge is
And
I was just trying to be like
The women I admire
So courageous in their
Commitment
To speak the truth
But now I feel
Split in two
And
Maybe it was naive
To think
That people in business
Would understand
What I’m doing
Are one in the same
Pursuing my passion
And trying to help
Now I’m scared
To have my poetry
Attached to my name
And I’m scared
I’ll be punished
For what
I’ve already said
That I’ll shut down
Out of fear
And be silent
Again

I wrote this in September of 2012, after it was suggested that sharing my poetry publicly was a risk to my business pursuits. Obviously, I haven’t gone silent:)

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About Sarah McKinney

Sarah McKinney is an entrepreneur, market researcher, writer, musician, poet and yogi. Writing poetry has always been a natural part of her process, used as a way to gain clarity on, and express, what's going on inside. She currently lives in Santa Monica where you can find her doing all the cliched things people in Santa Monica do, and loving every minute of it. Learn more at: http://sarahmck.com/