Intent of the Day: Get Outside!

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Spring is around the corner and that means it’s time to start adventuring. Climb out of that winter hibernation. Dust off your boots, dig out your backpack and get going. If you’re not quite ready to trek too far from home, we still have a couple of sneaky ways to start incorporating the outdoors into your day-to-day routine. Our intent? It’s to go outside!

You too? Here are 3 ways you can squeeze it in: Continue reading

Intent of the Day: Patience with Speed

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We’ve got a lot to do today and slowing down doesn’t appear anywhere on the list. The frustrating thing is that there are other people on this planet! People in their cars. People on the sidewalk going slower than we want. People in aisles. People we’re waiting to answer phone calls or emails or texts or give us a green light. People are slowing us down!

In reality, we hope to never live on an island unto ourselves. People can make an experience frustrating, but when we choose to be patient and take a moment, we increase the likelihood that we gain a partner or an advocate versus a speed bump. In other people we find wisdom, we pass on wisdom and we find the support we need to make these to-do lists a thing of the past, so today our intent is to be patient with those who aren’t going our speed.

You too? Here are 3 reasons why you should: Continue reading

Intent of the Day: Keep the Faith

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All things are inconstant except the faith in the soul,
which changes all things and fills their inconstancy
with light.
-James Joyce

Faith changes everything. It’s easy to be discouraged and it’s easy to give up. People give up everyday and sometimes throwing in the towel is the best option, but today we want to think about the circumstances that require a little faith. These are the circumstances that scare us a little bit, that require a little bit of hope and strength. These are the things that challenge us but ultimately make us stronger and more prepared to tackle the next big vision. We intend to keep the faith!

You too? Here are 3 things to help you do that: Continue reading

DearJames: There’s No Spark

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DearJames

I am over 50 & have been married for over 26 years. We have one child – early 20’s, independent but still at home. I have fallen out of love with my husband. I love him but there is NO spark. I have come to this realization within the last couple of years since becoming an (almost) ’empty nester’. I was too busy to realize this sooner. I have tried talking to him and we have tried counseling; counseling failed due to poor counselor. There is no intimacy between us. I know this is something I can’t live without. I have never cheated on him but I have had some recent temptations. He is (too) agreeable with any thing I suggest but it never accomplishes anything. He ‘listens’ to me and agrees but everything seems to go in one ear and out the other. He is not abusive or addicted to anything (drugs, alcohol, gambling, etc.). He can’t possibly be happy with the way things are. I asked him if he was gay and he said no. He has difficulty with physical intimacy due to his being overweight & some medications he takes. He gives little effort to lose weight and get off his meds. I don’t know if I should stay or not.

-NO Spark

Dear NO Spark

Asking someone for directions is easy: understanding them so you arrive at your intended destination requires a whole other set of skills. Continue reading

Intent of the Day: Feel the Disappointment

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We put plenty of focus on how to find and stay happy. We celebrate happiness and it’s understandable that we would want to stay in a place of joy and goodness, but that isn’t the only emotion that will come across our place over the course of a lifetime. Part of the gift of being alive is the gift of being able to feel both the highs and the lows- to know disappointment means that we at one time hoped so big. To feel loss means we first had. To struggle means we know what it means to feel content and ease, and while we do not wish to spend any more time than we have to at the bottom of despair, we want to honor those feelings just as much as we would the ones that feel positive. Those emotions are real and indicate important information about what matters to us.

Our intent is to let ourselves feel our disappointment.

You too? Here are 3 things to help: Continue reading

Ready, Aim, Bullseye: Seven Sentences That Will Go Straight to Her Heart (and why they work)

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I know that when my husband married me, he took on hefty responsibilities—not just for himself anymore—but for me and our future children, including promises to…

  • Please (always),
  • Provide (as much as possible),
  • Protect (when necessary),
  • Problem solve (as called upon), and
  • Procreate (as agreed upon)

But it wasn’t enough.

Because my appetite for attention was insatiable and his execution was never up to feminine standards, my subtle calls for transformation (“hints”) began to sound more like commands. Of course, when that approach didn’t work either, I resorted to ultimatums. It nearly broke us. What I didn’t understand at the time of course was how insecurity—common feminine anxiety—was the actual saboteur. Misdirected and misunderstood, my fear-inspired attempts to connect with my husband actually threatened to disconnect us—permanently.

You’ve probably jousted like that with your own wife and know what it feels like to be knocked off your horse. Chances are her heart remains a moving target, and your efforts to play Cupid continually fall short. As frustrating and demoralizing as that may feel, I’m here to ask you not to give up on her, or yourself. There is a way to aim those well-intentioned arrows with pinpoint accuracy.

In this archery lesson, we’ll identify seven relational values women prize most (beyond the above five “P’s”). Honoring these seven feminine needs or desires, practically universal to women, will work wonders in allaying her fears; minimizing behaviors that hurt you both.

Note the first letter in each value: their alphabetical order will help summon up the right one at the right moment. Champion archers, in the heat of a tournament, have to know their stuff by heart. Continue reading

Strategies to Face the Unthinkable: When a Spouse is Diagnosed with Alzheimer’s

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The moment a loved one receives the terrifying diagnosis of Alzheimer’s disease, difficult changes are on the horizon. I can think of nothing more daunting than to be a spouse facing these challenges. The supporting partner must navigate relationship changes, safety issues, as well as medical and financial decisions. At the same time, they are left to grieve the relationship they once knew.

Life will soon be inexplicably changed forever. The partner, now altered by this disease, will likely exhibit challenging behaviors and unpredictable personality changes. It is a difficult road full of unthinkable demands for the one providing care. A new reality requiring a tremendous amount of support. Following are suggestions for those facing this tragedy. Continue reading

An Effective Way to Move from Negativity to a Positive Future in 5 Steps

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And whatever you ask in prayer, you will receive, if you have faith. ~Matthew 21:22

There is a lot more negativity today than ever before. Is there truth in that statement? Your answer is really the narrative or perspective you choose to view life. It’s in your way of thinking, your state of mind.

A negative view can add unnecessary stress and hold you back from reaching your intended goals or ignore what’s really important. You can learn to turn negative thinking into positive thinking. The process is simple, but it does take time and practice because you’re actually creating a new habit after all.

Don’t expect to become an optimist overnight if you tend to have a negative outlook. But with practice, eventually your self-talk will contain less self-criticism and more self-acceptance. You will also become less critical of your environment and the world around you.

When your state of mind is generally optimistic, you’re better able to handle everyday stress in a more constructive way. That ability may contribute to the widely observed health benefits of positive thinking.

The following points are an effective way to help you focus on what’s important, and move from negative thoughts to more positivity in 5 simple steps: Continue reading

Intent of the Day: Time to Pray

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Prayer has been defined as “a solemn request for help or expression of thanks addressed to God or an object of worship.” Whether or not you have faith God, a god or no god, the practice of asking for help and expressing gratitude is an important one for everyone. It is how we begin the conversation of what is real and true for us as individuals. It is in the act of prayer that we quiet our souls and get honest with ourselves which is why it is our intent to take time to pray.

Need help connecting? We have 3 resources to help: Continue reading

10 Driving Tips That Could Save Your Life

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The rules of the road don’t waver, but that doesn’t mean you still can’t learn a thing or two about how to be a better driver. For most of us, driving school and DMV handbooks are long behind us, but there are still some tips that we can use to keep us and our loved ones safer on the road. These 10 driving tips could save your life, so read carefully and pass them along to your friends and family, too. You never know when you might need them. Continue reading

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