You might think feeling sexy has to do with your body, with looking a certain way, wearing a certain thing, or doing something in particular. When you base your sexiness and your desirability on some external, however, you are only a stone’s throw away from suffering. If you accept what mainstream culture has to say about sexiness, you are bound to hurt. If you are sexy when you are thin and svelte, what happens as you age? If you are sexy because your body looks a certain way, what happens when it changes? If you are sexy because of the clothes you wear, or the make-up you apply, or the way you style your hair, what happens when you take the clothes off, when you wash your face clean, and you wake up in the morning with your hair sticking out every which way?
When you based your sex-appeal on externals, it means that sometimes you are sexy, and sometimes you are not. This isn’t necessarily a problem, accept for the fact that sexiness often translates into desirability, lovability, and a feeling of being worthwhile. In my experience, nothing is more painful than feeling like sometimes you are just not quite good enough.
Have you ever felt like no matter what you do, you are just not sexy enough? Or that you are only desirable if you look a certain way? If you have ever felt like this, it means you are basing your sex-appeal and your desirability on externals, which are always bound to change.
There is a way to break free from this and discover the sexiness that is always inside of you. You can discover the beauty, the lovability, and the desirability that is always present, always now, and always available.
This comes from discovering that you are that which makes everything sexy and desirable. You are the very thing that you long for – you are sexiness itself. You are inherently beautiful, you are inherently loveable. No matter what the outside looks like, whether you are dressed up for an evening event or wearing your pajamas, you can feel sexy. You can feel sexy because you are that which creates, expresses, and experiences sexiness, beauty, and love.
Ultimately, the outside reflects the inside. The more immersed you are in this unchangeable part of yourself, the more you will be able to create a life that is a reflection of your inherent beauty.
So feeling sexy, feeling beautiful, feeling desirable is not so much about doing anything. Rather, consider it a great undoing. Discovering your sexiness is more a process of removing everything that you are not, removing the beliefs, the thoughts, the limitations. It is about seeing the thoughts that make you believe you are not sexy and learning to ignore them. Thoughts such as:
–I am too old to feel sexy
–I have too many wrinkles
–My butt is too big
–My skin is not clear enough
–If only I had, looked, or was anything other than what I am, then I would be sexy
Discover that these thoughts are just thoughts. You don’t need to listen to them. Then turn your attention to the thinker of the thoughts, that eternal part of yourself that is beyond the thoughts you think. Learn to listen to this part of yourself and you will discover that you are now, have always been, and will always be the sexiness that you desire. You are the infinite beauty of the cosmos, manifesting as a human being.
Always remember, you are inherently loveable and desirable. As you discover this, the outside world will shift to reflect this internal reality. And you will experience yourself as the majestically beautiful, intrinsically sexy person that you are and always will be.
Smile inwardly…because you know something, Jas
Sexuality, feeling sexy and being sexual is an inherent human quality. Every woman is sexy. Every woman is beautiful. Human sexuality is deeply connected to the body our evolutionary history gave us. It is connected to the ability of the female body to experience intense prolonged orgasmic pleasure. It does matter how old you are but not in the way society teaches. So many young women receive so much unwanted sexual attention from men they do not know or care to know that they get turned off. On the other hand experience is just as important in sexuality as it is in other areas of human learning. Therefore the older you are the better you should be at what sex is all about, the female orgasm. Older women have stronger, deeper and longer orgasms that is if they have a lover who appreciates them. Your clothes, perfume, jewelry, and cultural status do not determine your sexual power. Your sexuality comes from your soul, and deep and regular orgasms will bring you to know your own soul like no other experience, save that of a meditative master. The reason for that is that meditation and orgasm share many neurologic characteristics. The bottom line is that you as a woman are amazingly and intensely sexual all you have to do is BE YOURSELF.
love and light,
Stuart
http://stuartmarkberlin.com
resrchmd@aol.com
Sarah Maria,
What an insightful post. This line says it all "Discovering your sexiness is more a process of removing everything that you are not, removing the beliefs, the thoughts, the limitations."
Wonderful.
Catherine
Have a perfect day!