Tag Archives: Advice

Aging as a Sport: A 5 Point Game Plan for Empowered Aging

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If you ever played a sport you probably came up against many challenges, trained hard, and accepted accountability for your actions. Sports are not easy, especially at the highest levels but they teach us a lot about life, ourselves, and are also rewarding and fun. If you talk to world class competitors, they will probably tell you that the best part of their experience as an athlete was when they had to battle to win. 

Aging successfully requires the same skills and mindset as an athlete playing his or her sport because as we get older, in order to enjoy our lives and still be productive, we no longer get to cruise on autopilot. Getting older is a challenge! We must step up, or get beaten down.  The analogy of taking on aging as a sport motivates us to get off the bench, put on our helmets, get into the game, and maybe for the first time really take charge of our lives. Aging is not something we should fear.  It is a privilege that should not be taken lightly.  After all, look at all the people we know who didn’t make it this far.   

So how can we take on aging as a sport?  Here is a 5-point game plan for empowered aging:  Continue reading

Marriages That Last: Small Gestures Yielding Big Benefits

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It has been sixty-five years since my parents’ wedding, a ceremony celebrating their commitment to love each other forever. Many years of dedication and shared experiences after they wed, Alzheimer’s disease stole the memories of this promise. After their diagnoses, I watched in amazement as my parents newly discovered each admirable trait which brought them together decades before.

Now refined through trials and seasoned with life’s experiences, their attraction was magnetic. My parents’ shared disease made me wonder: what keeps marriages strong despite the challenges of life we all face? I believe it is more than sheer grit and determination. Experiencing my parents’ love on autopilot led me to believe the key to lasting love is in developing basic traits which become the essence of who we are. Continue reading

Daring to Trust Again

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You were brave. You let yourself love fully. You were vulnerable and open. And you were crushed when the person you gave your heart to abused your love. Now, even though you want a healthy new relationship, it’s hard to trust that you won’t be hurt again.

Does this sound familiar? It’s not just you. I’m a therapist as well as a dating coach, and as such I’m well aware that many people re-entering the dating field after a bad experience are understandably cautious. They have seen the darkness and felt the risk of loving.

More most this isn’t just an intellectual decision, it’s a feeling. You might genuinely want to date, but find it hard to feel excited about anyone you meet. Or you lose any emerging feelings of attraction for them over the slightest thing. Our you just feel flat, and exhausted when you think about dating.

On some level, you know you’re protecting yourself from being hurt again, but you can’t control the way you feel. It’s like knowing you should eat a healthy meal, but having absolutely no appetite. What to do? Continue reading

Break the Norms: Bad Things to Good People

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Several weeks ago we asked our Intent community “what are the life questions that come up most regularly?”

We received many excellent ones. Some we regularly shared. Some brought new perspective. We asked the author of Break the Norms: Questioning Everything You Think You Know About God and Truth, Life and Death, Love and Sex, Chandresh Bhardwaj to share his words of wisdom on the delicate topics and today we are happy to share and answer to our first question.

Why do bad things happen to good people? Continue reading

Best Marriage Advice for Everyone

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Most people believe that only those people who marry their soul mate have marriages that last.  A myth is that long marriages are the result of two people falling deeply in love and never losing that feeling.  Romance novels and romantic movies both show the same myth – that only those passionately in love have strong marriages.  The truth is far different.

The best advice you will ever hear is that the best marriages are created when two people fall in love and then work hard to stay that way.  Marriage is not easy and both spouses need to work to be happy and in love every day.  You may not believe this, especially if you are new in the relationship and still see stars when you and your special someone kiss.  This is an amazing feeling and one you never want to end.

In reality, the stars will fade if you depend on emotions to fuel the feelings.  You need to make a conscious effort every day to let your spouse know how much you love and respect him/her.  This can be really tough when life gets busy with jobs, children and a house to take care of, but if you don’t want to do all of this alone, you need to make your spouse your first priority. Continue reading

7 Ways to Get Out of A Slump: And One Reason Why Not To

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By Andrew Bryant

I’m in a slump. I’m sure you’ve been here, or maybe you are in one to?

How do I know I’m in a slump?

My batteries feel flat, focus is elusive and I am drawn to my couch like a moth to a flame. Your symptoms may be different, but you know you are not operating at your best.

What’s really embarrassing about this, and causing me some guilt, is that I am an author on personal development and self-leadership – surely, I shouldn’t be in a slump?

The surprising fact is, I don’t want to get out of my slump, well not yet anyway! I am like the man who is happy at the bottom of a hole, you see I both know the way out and I know the benefit of being in the hole.

Mostly I maintain pretty high-energy. Zest is, in fact one of my strengths, but when we are ‘go, go, go’ we can miss the subtle things. So I am accepting my slump. Why? Because it’s my slump. Nobody did this to me. It’s my body signaling me something, and in accepting that I can get the message.

Often we force ourselves to push through low performance, but if it really is a slump, the best strategy is to call it. By naming and owning your slump, ultimately you put yourself back in control.

Everything in life has cycles, the weather, the stock market, and your energy levels. The secret of success is to ride the cycle, and benefit from the down-time.

So I’m in a slump and you maybe you are too, so what’s the benefit?

It’s time to reflect, to regroup, and to decide on what’s important and what’s not. Use your slump to nurture yourself and become aware of what really matters to you. When you have answered this question, and given your body some rest, do the following: Continue reading

10 Tips to Help You Find Long-Lasting Love

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What’s the key to finding long-lasting love? How many of you know the difference between a fling and real love? Is there an actual recipe to pure, genuine emotional intimacy? Believe it or not, the secret to building a strong romantic relationship is made of a blend of feelings – lust, respect, adoration, trust and many more. Love is artistic and not necessarily scientific. There are times when we fall in love for all the wrong reasons, and even though we know it might damage our soul, we do it anyway. Are you willing to take a leap of faith in the name of love? Here are 10 tips to help you find real love.
Continue reading

6 Ways to Tell Your Child About Your Addiction

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By Dr. Patricia Ryding

The involvement of your family is an important part of a healthy recovery from substance addiction—and that doesn’t just mean the adults in the picture. Sobriety is about love and connection, and if you have children, that love and connection is vital to creating a space in which your entire family thrives.

However, at the beginning of your journey, that connection might be damaged, especially if your children witnessed your substance-fueled behavior. Because the substance has stood between you and your loved ones for a while, it might be hard to bridge that gap, especially at the beginning. That’s completely understandable, but it doesn’t have to stop you from sharing with your children.

Children are highly aware of their surroundings, so they probably have picked up on some issues. A child might not be able to express what they have processed about your struggle up to this point, but rest assured that they have noted it. Now ask them to join into strengthening your lives together. You are building a new life walking away from those substance issues, so ask your children to join with you in your journey.

Here are some things to keep in mind. Continue reading

A New Year’s Pep Talk: Quotes to Kick off 2016

There’s a lot of hype around the New Year to make a bold statement or write a list of resolutions for the coming year. We imagine it’s because January 1st is such a clear starting line. You have 365 (366 this year!) to chart progress and you’re in the midst of the whole world launching into new goals and pursuits alongside you.

But changing your life can be daunting.
What if you fail?
What if you forget or lose motivation?
What if it requires more work than originally expected?

The good new is that January 1st isn’t the only day we wake up brand new.
Every 24 hours is an opportunity to do something different, to make a bold choice, to risk.
Everyday is a chance so we’re going to encourage you to go for it.
Whatever that big dream, goal, intent might be, just go for it.
In case you need a little extra support, here are some words from the wise about kicking off a new year: Continue reading

Celebrate Women’s Equality Day with Those Who Paved the Way

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Today marks the 95th anniversary of American women gaining the right to vote and so, has been named Women’s Equality Day. In that time, much progress has been made and at the same time, it’s hard to believe that women have had a voice in American politics for less than a century. Time Magazine reported that only 20% of the US government is represented by a female while female voter turnout has surpassed males at every election since 1980.

With plenty of distance still to go in the world of women’s equality globally, we celebrate our ladies with words of wisdom from those who have come before and sacrificed greatly and pioneered in a variety of ways for the good of many: Continue reading

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