Tag Archives: courage

Featured Intent: Hero In My Own World

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Who are you waiting on to save you?
Superhero films are a big market and it’s not just because we would all love to be super strong, super fast or super good looking. There is the relieving part of knowing that someone is coming to save us, that we’re not on our own, that someone else will step in. But what happens when they don’t? And do we really need someone else to step in? Sometimes, sure. Sometimes, being a hero is an outside job and that is okay. But we can forget that we also have the power to be our own heroes. Who knows us better than ourselves? Who else knows our distraction tactics, the lies we tell ourselves, our biggest triggers? We can be very dangerous to ourselves, but we can also be the heroes we need, because who else knows what we love, what really motivates us, what makes us light up?

So today we want to lean into that space- the space where we get to be the hero we’ve been looking for.

You too? Here are 3 resources to help: Continue reading

Intent of the Day: Beauty We See

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This week it has been our intention to notice beauty in the places we tend to take for granted or overlook. In ourselves, in others, in our surroundings. The act of noticing causes us to slow down and to train our eyes to look for something specific. To notice beauty is to disrupt the cycle we can find ourselves in where we are noticing what didn’t go our way. We end up noticing the people we don’t like, the ways we were slighted, the things that didn’t go our way, the disappoints we have with others and ourselves. Adter spending the week noticing the beautiful, we want to take the next step and call out the beauty we see. Why? Because it’s nice for someone else to hear? Sure. But we are also changed when we speak out the kindness and goodness we recognize.

How? He are 3 ways we were changed:
Continue reading

Words to Inspire Your New Year

Last year, many of our Intent team chose words to focus on in 2014.
Words like “courage” or “fun” became our banners for the days to come and, speaking personally, having a simple focus made life so much easier.
My word being “fun”, I would ask myself:
“What is the fun option?” 
“Would this be fun to me?”
“Which choice is more fun?”
It didn’t always mean that my choice was the most frugal or the most realistic.
It simply meant that whatever I was doing was the most fun.
The singular focus was so helpful in easing the anxiety and complication of decision-making which happened to be my issue at the time.

This year I’ll choose a new word. I encourage you to do the same.
Some options? Continue reading

Don’t Be Afraid: A Dose of Inspiration

Spiders. Public speaking. Ridicule. Failure.
There are lots of things that appear to warrant fear. No one would fault you for being afraid of sharks or risking it all, but throughout history, great men and women have had a lot to say about the freedom that comes from conquering those fears.
Let us encourage you- you can do the same thing!
You don’t have to be afraid anymore. Don’t believe us?
Here are some of our favorite quotes from some of our favorite people on the subject.

fearimage borrowed from Oprah.com

Continue reading

From Intent.com: Time to follow through

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You buy a brand new television and keep it in the box in your garage.
You buy plane tickets for a vacation to Bali and then never pack or go to the airport.
You get engaged and then married to a person you don’t even really like.

If you did any of those things, my hope is that the people in your life would say “hey, what’s up?” They’re trite examples, I get it, but we do it all the time with our own lives.

Everyday people are posting their intentions on Intent.com.
People are wanting support as they embark on new business ventures, lifestyle choices, or general adventures.
You can intend to change your eating habits.
You can intend to ignore fear.
You can intend to make a fresh start.
But what happens the moment after you make an intention?

Don’t ignore the other half of setting an intention which is seeing it come to fruition. What is the point of spending money on plane tickets to Bali if you never plan on getting on a plane to begin with? What is the point of wanting to conquer fear if the moment you voice that desire, you immediately forget it? Our hope is to see people empowered to live the lives they dream of. If you want to conquer fear, then our hope is that you absolutely will.

So, check this out.

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Mallika posted an intention about committing to her health.
Awesome.
But now what?

Does she go back to ordering fast food? Does she stay up late and wake up early?
Instead, she came back and affirmed her choice. She reminded herself of her goal.
She found support and advice from other users left as comments.
She updated us on her progress. Now, I say it was for us, but honestly, it’s just as much for her. It’s written on the stones of time (or just the internet) and she can keep moving forward while being able to see how far she’s come.

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So if you haven’t been yet, it’s time to be serious about taking the TV out of the box.
You’re breathing, so you have everything you need to get the process started.

There’s no promise it won’t be hard work.
There’s no promise it won’t mean going against your instincts for self preservation or that you won’t have to cut things out of your life, a pruning of sorts. But what is more worthwhile?

My mom always says “the time is going to pass no matter what.”
Sometimes we don’t take on challenges because it’ll take forever.
We don’t want to go back to school. We don’t want to get back in the gym.
Purely because the results will be a long way off, we don’t start.
But the time is going to pass no matter what.
Whether it’s 2 weeks, 2 months, 2 years, wouldn’t you rather be on the other side of it a little (if not a lot) closer to where you dreamed?

It’s Monday, to day is a good day to follow through.

From Intent.com: One Word for the Year

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I have a friend who always starts her new year by choosing a word.
One word to focus on all year.
I never choose a word because I like lots of words. It’s hard to commit.
I like the word “superfluous”. I like words like “indigenous” and “lax”.
HOW COULD I BE EXPECTED TO PICK ONE WORD?!

Then I started reading “The Gifts of Imperfection” by Brené Brown.
She is a researcher/writer/the kind of human I’m glad exists. She was writing about courage, compassion and connection. She said that the original meaning of courage was “to speak one’s mind by telling all one’s heart.”

WHAT. Mind blown. The modern use of the word normally refers to a person who is heroic. Acting like a hero. In later chapters, Brené will also ask herself “what is brave for you?” What is the brave way for you to act or respond in any certain situation? For me, it appears that the brave thing, not my first instinct, is to live a courageous life in a way that reflects the original meaning of the word.

This year, 2014, I’ve chosen “courage” as my word.
Trust me, I already feel just a little bit more in touch with my feelings than I’m comfortable with. I think that’s how this is supposed to work, though.

So what’s your word? Who do you want to be this time next year?

Other good things for you to check out:

1. Intent.com – Share your words. Share your hopes and dreams. Meet 30,000 of the best cheerleaders you could’ve hoped for. Check it out.
2. “The Power of Vulnerability“- Brené Brown’s TED Talk. It’s 20 minutes.
You have time.
3. One Word 365 – It’s a community of people who choose a word and stick with it. Find others who chose your word. Be a better human. Make friends.

6 Ways to Develop Courage

shutterstock_60280756By Dr. Sherrie Campbell

Life is challenging for us all. We are in the constant flux of change and rearranging ourselves around life to be able to go with its flow. Life is challenging us all to grow each and every day, as there is always some obstacle that will present itself to us which will create fear and anxiety. If we run away from our challenges life will continue to get harder, not necessarily because the lessons get harder, but because we are not developing the skills we need to deal with the challenges. Each challenge we face gives us the opportunity to run from it or we can choose to get deliberate about it, take it seriously and look it in the face. This is a great way to develop courage.

6 Ways to Develop Courage:

1) Set your standards:  No one can set your standards in life for you but you. Your standards reflect you state of self-love. If you love yourself you will encourage yourself to face your fears and get deliberate about growing in this life. You will not take the easy way out but rather you will choose to do the path of hard work, knowing your hard work is where the rewards of life come from.

2) Evaluate where you get lost: It is easy to get lost in life when we are feeling vulnerable, without love or are dealing with rejection. This is not a time to shrink, nor is it a time to get puffed up in your ego and behave as if you are certain when you are not. It is simply a time to get deliberate on examining the path that has led you to this current state of pain and become thoughtful about improving yourself and your skills.

3) Stand your ground: There is something deeply self-loving about standing your ground. This isn’t about being stubborn, it is about standing in truth of who you are and in what you will or will not tolerate. When you stand your ground you are making a statement of your value. You let the world know you have limits to what you are willing to accept in your life.

4) Enliven Your Worth:  Your inner world, your self-love is your place of worth. Each time you are courageous and you surpass a challenge you once feared you enliven and expand your sense of worth. Your worth has no limits as long as you are facing your fears. Each fear you face aids in you developing more trust in yourself and you become more centered and confident as a person.

5) Stay away from drama: The healthier you become the more pointed you become about staying away from drama. Drama, as you grow, will no longer fit into your standards. There simply is no room for it. You recognize that peace is much more powerful than noise.

6) Letting go:  You must learn to let go of having the need to be everything to everyone. You must get serious about loving yourself and creating a life that comes from a quiet confidence. You must let go of what you have no control over and refocus on what you can control. As you let go you learn to let each soul walk their path. When you let go you learn to have the courage to face life on your own knowing that whatever leaves your life will soon be replaced by something better and more fulfilling.

By facing challenges in life head on you will become courageous and resilient. You learn that you can take the hard road, you can succeed in the climb through your fears and vulnerabilities and you can reach the top. You see that it takes a lot of effort to climb up the mountain of fear but it takes no effort at all to fall down it and quit. If you quit or if you do not try you cannot develop courage.  To develop courage you must be deliberate.

Little Life Message:  You cannot expect anyone to take responsibility for your welfare. You must be deliberate and courageous in taking care of yourself first.

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Dr. Sherrie Campbell is the author of Loving Yourself and is a licensed Psychologist with more than nineteen years of clinical training and experience. She provides practical tools to help people overcome obstacles to self-love and truly achieve an empowered life. Click here to get her free article on “Five Ways to Make Love the Common Ground in Your Communication.”   She is a featured expert on a variety of national websites and has a successful practice in Southern California. Receive free insights from Sherrie and to be involved in her Facebook community of others looking to improve their relationship. For more information visit http://www.sherriecampbellphd.com.

Don’t Get Talked Out Of Your Passion. Ever.

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By Jay Forte

You wanted to start your own bakery and your parents told you that was crazy – so you didn’t.

You wanted to write a computer app that would help people source jobs that fit them and your college roommates talked you out of it.

You wanted to marry someone who had a great love of adventure but you got married to whom you were dating at the time because your friends were getting married and thought it would be great to all get married in the same year.

You wanted to study writing in college so you could be a novelist; your family told you to stop be ridiculous and get a real job.

We get talked out of things all the time – even the important things. Though others may mean well, they offer advice to help us stay safe; they care about us and they don’t want us to do anything “foolish.” But staying safe frequently translates into living small, and living small means not living your dreams, abilities or potential. As Helen Keller said, “Life is a daring adventure or it is nothing.” But few of us would say life is a daring adventure; we’ve been talked out of it.

See, a great life is one that we define based on who we are – what we are good at, what we are passionate about and what matters to us. No one can fill in this information for us. Only we can define what a great life must be for us. Though we each have the ability and responsibility to choose for our lives, we frequently give these away and blend into life. We weren’t born to blend; we were born to stand out by doing the things that matter and fit us.

Our dreams, desires and unique abilities create a road map for our definition of a great life. They are the clues about the things that resonate with us. Listen to these and we have the information we need to choose wisely in life. Don’t listen to these, or listen too much to others, and we quickly move off our road in life and onto theirs. As I told my kids, if you are on a road in life and find other footprints in it, you are likely on someone else’s road. Check in on you and what is important to you. It is likely you will find a virgin path waiting for your steps.

To help yourself find the courage to say what you want for your life and go get it (regardless of what others say) consider these three things:

  1. Know what makes you unique, different and amazing – your talents, strengths and passions. Embrace your uniqueness as your competitive advantage – your way to stand out and find your way in a world of 7.1 billion people. What is different about you is what is right about you. Knowing this gives you clarity.

  2. Know your world to discover and choose the places that need what you do best or will add to your definition of success and happiness. Find your place and direction in today’s world that needs the “you” that you defined in the step above. This creates possibilities.

  3. Connect the unique you to the real world to find those places that will allow you soar, find your fit and love your life. Define it. Post it. Think about it. Share it with others. Get excited about your vision. Be determined. This gives you focus.

The number 1 regret of the dying, shared in the powerful article, “Regrets of the Dying“, by Bronnie Ware, is “I wish I had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.” Wow. Don’t wait until you are on your deathbed to say what you want for your life and go get it. Know what you want. Find a way to get it. Don’t get talked out of it.

You know you. Trust your judgment. Find places that fit you in today’s world that give you great joy, love and enthusiasm. Dance when others sit. Run when others walk. Sing when others grumble. Come out when others hide. Be grateful when others complain. Live out loud in your way, on your terms, at your speed. Don’t get talked out of it.

So open the bakery. Write the app. Marry who you love. Write the book. Travel the world. Be an accountant. Be a mortician. Be happy. Love your life. Help others learn to love theirs. Don’t get talked out of it. Ever.

How to Deal When You’re Outside of Your Comfort Zone

In my latest vlog, I discuss “How to Deal When You’re Outside of Your Comfort Zone.” Whether you’re starting down a new path, trying on a new behavior or letting go of an old one, here are three tips to help ease the discomfort that comes with stepping outside of the box:

 

 

For more, check out my website, The Light Files, and follow me on Facebook or Twitter.

 

More from Laura Max:

Why I Choose the Solo Life, For Now

Why I’m a Feminist

Confessions of an Ex-Serial Dater

 

Thumbnail image: Daniele Nicolucci

Live Boldly: How to Find the Courage to “Stand Out”

TrapezeBy Jay Forte

“They laugh at me because I am different. I laugh at them because they are all the same.”

When you look and act like everyone else, two alarming things happen:

1. You don’t play to your unique abilities and greatness, and

2. You blend.

You weren’t born to blend; you were born to stand out. You are different, unique, and amazing so that you can find your way in a world of 7 billion people. Your specific talents, strengths and passions are your competitive advantage – your built-in abilities. When you discover what you rock at, you not only find you road in life, but you live your “stand out.”

Despite this amazing and intrinsic ability to stand out, most of us choose to blend. We dress alike. We sound alike. And when someone challenges the conventional, we immediately see them as weird and a misfit. Instead, they are actually the ones who fit – they fit their own definition of life. We, on the other hand, are not living true to who we are when we let others tell us who we should be. We have such a need to feel accepted by becoming who others want us to be that give up on our greatest gift – our uniqueness and the opportunity to make a profound impact on our world with what it is we are great at.

As a speaker, life coach, and founder of an organization that focuses on helping people discover and live authentic and powerful lives, I am always on the search for those who live authentically. In virtually every case, their intention wasn’t to outwardly or boldly challenge the conventional, rather it was just to be true to who they are – on the inside.

In talking with those who boldly live who they are, I find it is courage that allows them to stand out. So let’s follow this back. What encourages their courage? Meaningful choices. When they chose things that fit who they were, they saw the impact of their great choices which fed their courage. And what preceded their great choices was clarity – they know who they were.

Here is the lesson for all of us. When we are consciously aware of our unique abilities – our particular talents, strengths and passions – we have valuable and meaningful information about us. We then use the information to make choices that fit us; we feel capable and competent. This drives our courage to continue to make good choices for who we are. This courage allows us to be who we are – however different it may be – in a world that loves for us to all look and act like everyone else.

So the next time you see someone stand out – catch your inner critic ready to judge them, hold them to your standard and criticize them as different and weird. Instead, consider applauding them for having the courage to live to their own standard – then use them as an inspiration for you to do the same.

What areas of your life do you blend in – and how can you change this? In what areas of your life do you stand out – and how can you continue this?

Someone greater than you thought you should be you – and made you to be distinct, different, unique and amazing. Why not show it off? Let’s get to a place where we applaud people for being who they are instead of judging them as weird just because they don’t look, sound and act like everyone else. None of us were born to blend; we were all born to stand out.

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