Tag Archives: family

Intent of the Day: Family First

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With the lightning speed that everything is happening these days, are we alone when we say that our families usually end up with the short end of the stick? Because we come home to them, we assume that time will naturally happen but this isn’t always the case. When our family gets the in-between time as we rush from event to event and task to task, we end up communicating that they aren’t a priority more than they are. Our intent of the day is to put family first. We want to be intentional in protecting our calendar, making space for the unscheduled and slowing down enough to enjoy our time because the time spent with the people who matter most is what will be the most valuable in the long run.

You too? Here are 3 resources to help: Continue reading

The Dangers of Helicopter Parenting During Rehab

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Parents understandably want to be their children’s biggest advocates. When a child’s recovery from drug or alcohol addiction hangs in the balance, that’s never truer. During rehab especially, that natural parental impulse to do anything to help can kick into overdrive. A well-meaning effort to support a child’s recovery, often amplified by a sense of guilt or responsibility for that child’s substance abuse, can feed a strong “over-parenting” reflex to save a child.

“Helicopter parenting” is the term clinical psychologists have attached to this phenomenon. It’s a fitting way to describe unhealthy parental hovering over a child’s every move: like pilots at the controls of a Black Hawk military aircraft, some parents at the first signs of a threat launch a full-scale air assault or swoop in and deploy a quick getaway for their child. And parents of children in rehab are especially vulnerable to this form of parenting, because they know their child’s risks of relapse pose harmful and potentially life-threatening consequences.

But what parents of children in rehab also need to know is that an “interminable ‘swoosh-swoosh-swoosh’” over their child’s every move can pose even greater dangers to that child’s recovery from drug or alcohol addiction. Knowing what these pitfalls to lasting sobriety are is key to boosting a child’s chances of success in rehab and beyond.

Helicopter Parenting and “Failure-to-Launch” Children
Helicopter parenting in rehab can result in the following dangers, all of which can account for a child’s failure to launch toward lasting freedom from drugs or alcohol: Continue reading

Battling the Myths of Foster Care

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There’s an ongoing battle to tear down the myths about foster care. In a recent NPR interview, one foster parent discussed the negative impressions that the public is often given related to foster care—and how it’s a barrier to the great work that can be accomplished: “I think all too often the focus is on the negative and not on the good things that happen, the kids that were reunited with their family or the adoption.”

To hFoster-Care-IG-for-Publish-Smallelp counteract negative perspectives and continue to educate Master of Social work students and social service professionals, SocialWork@Simmons created “The Facts of Foster Care.” This infographic provides the latest objective and authoritative data published by collecting bureaus related to foster children and foster families—as well as data that will help to dispel myths about foster care. The goal is to achieve better support for those who need it most—especially the children and those who are caring for them. Continue reading

Seven Things I Want my Dad to Know Before It’s too late

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Sure we’d say, “I love you,” and some things were just understood, but we didn’t necessarily communicate on a certain level – that level where you just sit around clearly communicating and talking about feelings. Our actions spoke louder than words, so it was clearly shown how everyone felt, and I felt loved, but I wish I could verbalize some things – to further convey that love. Below are seven things I’d want my dad to know before it was too late: Continue reading

6 Ways to Tell Your Child About Your Addiction

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By Dr. Patricia Ryding

The involvement of your family is an important part of a healthy recovery from substance addiction—and that doesn’t just mean the adults in the picture. Sobriety is about love and connection, and if you have children, that love and connection is vital to creating a space in which your entire family thrives.

However, at the beginning of your journey, that connection might be damaged, especially if your children witnessed your substance-fueled behavior. Because the substance has stood between you and your loved ones for a while, it might be hard to bridge that gap, especially at the beginning. That’s completely understandable, but it doesn’t have to stop you from sharing with your children.

Children are highly aware of their surroundings, so they probably have picked up on some issues. A child might not be able to express what they have processed about your struggle up to this point, but rest assured that they have noted it. Now ask them to join into strengthening your lives together. You are building a new life walking away from those substance issues, so ask your children to join with you in your journey.

Here are some things to keep in mind. Continue reading

#ShareTheLoad: A Laundry Detergent Starts A Conversation About Gender Equality

Ariel brand laundry detergent just released a commercial that is more than just an ad. It’s even more than a sweet snapshot of a family at home. It is starting a conversation about gender equality, standards of upbringing for girls and boys and whether or not those things can change. Continue reading

Being the Role Model your Foster Child Needs

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Role models. They are everywhere. A few years back, controversy was stirred when a professional athlete once stated that he was not a role model. Unfortunately, this is not true for you. As a foster parent, you will be a role model for countless people, as many eyes will be upon you. Not only will you be a role model for your foster children, but for the public, as a whole. After all, not many in our society know what foster parenting or foster care is really about. If you are like me, your own friends and family members don’t even really know what you do. Gosh! I have written several books on foster care, have a radio show and a weekly video series, and have spoken to countless organizations. Yet, my own family doesn’t really appreciate what my wife and I do on a daily basis as foster parents. Continue reading

Forget New Year, New You! 2016 Intent: Take Small Steps to Make Lasting Change

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It’s January 8 and I am already way behind the New Year.

I have been eating a buttermilk biscuit for breakfast almost daily, and have worked out only once. (I did go for a 5 mile walk with friends.) I’m still tracking down addresses for our holiday (now New Year’s) card. I have an application sitting on my desk that I have had 6 months to complete, and that is due Jan 15th, and I will probably submit Jan 13th. (A day earlier than the deadline, because I have to teach and travel Jan 14th so that’s how long I can procrastinate). It took me a week to find Maria Kondo’s de-cluttering book in my stuffed drawers to lend to my sister-in-law.

I have so much to do for Intent, our company,  … like even posting my first intent for 2016 on our new Iphone app. Those who read my book, Living With Intent: My Somewhat Messy Journey to Purpose, Peace and Joy, may wonder, “oh dear, she still didn’t get her act together.” What a hypocritical writer!

But, I have to admit that this year, I am truly feeling a bit more grounded, more in control, more honest with my intents for 2016. While surfing the net, which I seem to have plenty of time to do, or opening up email newsletters from wellness blogs, headlines like New Year New You keep popping up.

Lose weight, stop eating sugar, find your dream job, feel your best, be the perfect mom.

Come on, who are we kidding!?

I’m not changing who I am this year. And, if I set resolutions (even 2 weeks late), I am only setting myself up for failure and disappointment. Lets admit it now, I will do my best to eat better, to cook more at home, to exercise regularly, to lose weight, to support my friends and family, to spend less money, to make more money, to grow my company, to promote my book, to meditate daily, to read more, etc! And I will make progress on some of these and totally fail at others.

My resolution is to give myself a break, to take one step at a time, to strive for change to lead a healthier, happier, more connected and more purposeful life. (My definition of Living with Intent.) And when I waver from the path – that messy journey – I will take a deep breath, indulge in my messiness for a while, and then reaffirm why I want to make changes.

My intents for 2016 are simple: Continue reading

Making Gratitude A Daily Practice In Your Kids Life

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By: Meghan S. Phillips

Gratefulness and thankfulness are both positive feelings and important factors when it comes to raising happy, responsible and authentic kids. When we think positively we attract more positive, which leads to attracting more abundance. And who doesn’t want a little of that?

Getting in the space of feeling grateful can help develop the habit of naturally seeing the silver lining, despite what you are going through. Surprisingly, it didn’t dawn on me until recently to start talking to my kids about the practice of gratitude.  Continue reading

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