Tag Archives: self-help

Rebuild Your Life After a Crisis

When your life as you know it falls apart, it is a great blessing. Give thanks.

In that moment realize that your life is actually falling together even though you might not see it. If your life falls apart then you are ready for something bigger. It falls apart because it was too small for who you are becoming. It falls apart because there is something more that is seeking to express itself in and as your life. It falls apart because what you were living is no longer in alignment with who you are. It falls apart because life is letting you know that perhaps you have gotten too comfortable where you’re at and need to grow to the next level.

Life is change. Life is growth. Life is a cycle of Creation-Life-Destruction. Every birth is another form of death. And every death is another form of birth. Often when things fall apart we become afraid, we panic, we resist and fight life. We hold on to what we know, even though it no longer works or serves us. This only keeps you stuck.

Holding on to the old will not bring what is new. Resisting what is new will not transform or change what is old. When life falls apart you can resist or fight, which ultimately only leads to suffering and struggle. So, what do you do when your life as you know it falls apart?

Simply, LET GO!

Perhaps it’s a relationship, job, or a house. Let Go! And Trust.

Trust that what no longer remains in your life is no longer meant to be there. And that the Universe is just making room for what is more in alignment with your highest good. When things fall apart the Universe is trying to make space for something greater. When life as you know it stops working and falls apart this is the moment to let go of your ego, as it can only take you so far. This is the moment to let go of your ego’s attachment of how your life should be, and surrender. In every crisis is an opportunity to let go of what is inauthentic and live with more integrity. In every breakdown is the blessing of a breakthrough. In every challenging situation is the gift to help your soul evolve and become who you were really meant to be. So if your life as you know it is falling apart give thanks and…LET GO!

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 If you are ready to experience freedom and live your true life purpose then join me on www.boundlessblissbali.com

How to Give Up What Other People Think of You

gossipWhat other people think about you is none of your business. It’s their business. Wasting your time thinking about what they are thinking about you, serves nothing. Seeking approval is a waste of your time and energy. It will only bring you suffering. It’s not about whether others approve of you but if you approve of you.

This is what counts.

Being popular with the world at the expense of your soul is a true booby prize. How people perceive you reveals more about themselves than it does about you. People will perceive you based on their own conditioning and filters. So don’t take it personally. We sometimes hold back being fully ourselves, or stepping out and living our purpose in a big way because of the fear of being judged and what people will think or say. Here’s the deal: When you put yourself out there in the world, and dare to follow your dreams, it is a risk. It is a vulnerable and courageous act.

People will judge you. People will talk about you. People will project their stuff onto you. It is what it is. In fact some people won’t like you. And they don’t even know you. This is unavoidable. Make peace with this up front. Do not give those that don’t even know you the power to determine your happiness. Do not give even those that know you the power to determine who you should be and what your limits are. Know who you are.

As you accept yourself as you are and as you are not. You become powerful. You consolidate your energy and remain rooted in your center. You become free. When you no longer seek other people’s approval you are free. As you unhook yourself from other people’s validation you become truly powerful. Your soul is already SELF validated. You can please some of the people some of the time but you can’t please all the people all of the time. In fact there will be those that, no matter what you do, will think negatively and never be satisfied. This has nothing to do with you.

Jesus. Bruce Lee. Gandhi. Bob Marley. Martin Luther King Jr. They all had people that didn’t like them. Remember that there really are no enemies. Just those that don’t know you yet and neither themselves. At the end of the day you are the one that has to live with yourself. Even if you do get others approval, if it’s at the expense of yourself, it won’t be truly satisfying. Trying to get people’s approval is a form of control. But in doing so you are the one that ends up controlled.

The energy it takes is not worth it, as it often requires you give up a part of yourself in order to get the approval. It’s expensive. As I often say, if everyone likes you you might want to be concerned. When you follow your heart you will make waves in this world. You will stand out. You will upset some people. You will create change. Life is a daring adventure to be lived with no regrets.It takes true boldness to be yourself fully. People have the right to think whatever they want to think about you. Let that be their business.

So what do you think about you? What other people think about you is none of your business!

VOD: How to Achieve More Success

There are so many books today on success that will teach you:

– How to make millions without any effort.

-How to get everything and anything that you want whenever you want it.

– How to manifest your soulmate to your exact specifications in less than 7 days guaranteed!

There are so many promises of success formulas, secret affirmations to control your reality exactly how you want it. They are all great but if you practice the key I am about to share with you, you will manifest beyond your wildest dreams. We tend to think that we know what we want but often we are determining what we want based on who we think we are. It is indeed helpful to be as clear as possible about what you want in life. However, sometimes it can be easy to get so attached to what you think your goals should look like or how you think life should be that you block the flow.

The mind can only take you so far, sometimes limiting what’s possible because it can’t see the whole picture. It functions in a purely linear and logical manner. So what is the secret key to success?

Surrender.

Yes, surrender. Surrender is not about giving up, rather it’s about opening beyond your mind’s perception to the highest good that is possible in any situation. Surrender is a giving up of your limited idea of what you think should be and being open to the infinite fulfillment and creativity of the Universe manifesting. Surrender doesn’t mean not being in action. It’s about bringing your actions into alignment with the highest flow and working in harmony with life.Your intention and prayer becomes, “Universe, I ask for only the highest possible outcome for my Soul and all concerned. Only the highest outcome!”.

Trust that your soul has an intelligence that is way beyond your mind. When you surrender you tap into a higher level of wisdom. When you surrender you tap into infinite intelligence. When you surrender you access the zone of miracles. You may not always get what you thought you wanted. But in surrendering you receive what your soul is most needing at this moment. As you evolve you often realize in retrospect that what you thought you wanted was not necessarily the case. Trust bigger than your mind.

Real success isn’t simply about what you achieve but who you become and how you evolve as a soul. What you achieve will come and go. Who you become will remain forever. When you surrender you go beyond your mind and bring yourself in sync with the entire universe that is already working on your behalf rather than just your limited small self. You will find that incredible things will happen in ways that are beyond what you originally planned. Surrender and set yourself free. Surrender and you will see the miracles manifesting all around. Surrender and you will achieve success beyond anything you can imagine.

 If you are ready to achieve the next level of your success, then join me on a life changing journey www.boundlessblissbali.com

Wordplay Wednesday: Stop Beating Yourself Up

Stop beating yourself up.

It serves nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

We all have things about ourselves that we want to change, or don’t like so much.

However, beating yourself up in order to change actually has the opposite effect.

Beating yourself up for not being loving enough or compassionate enough like the Dalai Lama.

Beating yourself up for any reason whatsoever serves nothing and is a waste of time.

There is so much pressure and expectation from society to conform, to be a certain way, to behave in a certain manner. It can suffocate your authentic expression.

Sometimes in an effort to improve we end up being very harsh and critical towards ourselves. We impose unrealistic expectations and pressures given by those around us. We bombard ourselves with unkind mental chatter and self talk.

Get all A’s.
Be perfect!
Never feel sad or negative.
Don’t make waves.
Be nice.

It becomes easy to be judgmental towards yourself.

Judging yourself as a way to be better will only lead to inner resistance and internal rebellion. It always backfires.

Whatever you judge about yourself you reinforce. Judgment is simply a way to perpetuate the very thing you are judging. It keeps you stuck.

Judging yourself doesn’t change the thing you are judging, it just tends to make it worse.

Anyone can be loving in an ashram. Anyone can be loving to Mother Teresa. But can you be loving to yourself?

There comes a moment when no matter how much healing or therapy you have done, how many books you have read or seminars that you have attended, you must make the bold choice to love yourself no matter what.

Loving yourself is a great act of courage. The simple yet powerful decision to love yourself no matter what is the key to your freedom.

It’s easy to love yourself when you perform, when you do it “right”, when you get all A’s, or when you are your ideal weight.

But can you love yourself even when you screw up, collapse, or fail? This is when it counts. This is the real spiritual practice.

You might find that the more kind and compassionate you are with who you are being and not being now, you actually end up getting to who you want to be much more quickly.

So commit to loving yourself even when you don’t succeed in fully loving yourself.

Can you love yourself even then?

Beating yourself up in order to get yourself to love yourself only creates more self hate.

Self hate never leads to self love. Beating yourself up in order to get yourself to improve more quickly actually slows you down.

We often think that when we heal, and become whole, we will then finally be worthy of loving ourselves. When in fact, it is the very act of loving yourself that will help you heal and feel real self worth.

When you accept yourself exactly as you are and exactly as you are not, you set yourself free.

So today can you be a bit more kind to yourself?

Healing is applying love to all the parts of you that hurt.

So stop beating yourself up and start loving yourself in this moment.

Nothing else needs to happen.

You don’t need to be any different.

You deserve it just because you ARE.

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Do you have a favorite or original poem you would like showcased on Wordplay Wednesday? We’d love to share it! Email the poem to editor@intent.com, and we will feature it in the series. Click here to view past Wordplay Wednesdays.

Wordplay Wednesday: Empowerment

GirlLaughingYoga-850x567Every moment of your life is an opportunity to live fully and to love boldly.

Your heart is your paintbrush.

Your life is your canvas.

You are an artist.

Art is not simply something in a museum.

Your art is your life.

What could you do?

What will you create?

Who would you be?

If you no longer let your fear, your past or your limitations stop you?

At any moment you can create magic. At any moment you can do something different from what you have done in the past. Never having done it before is no excuse to not do it now.

You were born for greatness!

There are dreams dancing within your soul for a reason. Your dreams are the way that life seeks to manifest itself in form.

Real heroes aren’t angels in the sky, floating amidst cotton candy clouds.

Real heroes don’t need to climb Mt. Everest, jump from planes or walk on hot coals to prove their strength.

Real heroes aren’t necessarily named Kobe or Cruise. They don’t run from life in order to find peace.

Real heroes deal. They know how to take responsibility for their lives, regardless of what has happened in the past.

Real heroes are those who have the courage to love, laugh and live fully, despite all of life’s challenges.

Real heroes are those who dare to live larger than what scares them, and live life with an open heart.

I acknowledge YOU because it takes courage to be alive and to be who you really are in this world.

So:

Blaze your own trail.

Dare ecstasy.

Defy gravity.

Transcend the past.

There are no refunds in life. It’s over before you know it. Live each moment fully with no regrets.

Remember, it’s not the risk you didn’t take.

It’s the love that you dared to make that is the difference.

No ones coming.

Not the government.

Not your parents.

Not some hero from the sky.

Because you are already here.

The world is waiting.

For you.

The time is NOW.

You are IT!

So don’t compromise your heart no matter what.

Dare to create a life that’s a masterpiece!

Love.Now

Kute

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If you are ready for the next level of your life, and to create the life you have always dreamed of, then join me on www.boundlessblissbali.com . It is the transformational journey of a lifetime. This Dec. 5th-16th. APPLY if you are READY!

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Do you have a favorite or original poem or motivational mantra you would like showcased on Wordplay Wednesday? We’d love to share it! Email the poem to editor@intent.com, and we will feature it in the series. Click here to view past Wordplay Wednesdays.

 

Grow Beyond Your Self-Imposed Limitations and Thrive!

shutterstock_120966337-e1357269512170

By Jay Forte

Walking through the neighborhood the other day, a dog came running off the front porch and ran right to the edge of the property. He stopped obviously aware of some special force field that marked his perimeter. I could see the sign for the invisible fence – that signal that is sent out to help dogs know their boundaries.

This got me thinking. We each have an “invisible fence” – we call it our limits. We know when we get close to the limits because something emotional, painful, fearful or otherwise intense and emotional surfaces. We then treat that feeling as a limit – a place we stay away from. But little do we know that if we push past that spot, we would see that it creates an entirely new area for us to be part of – larger, grander and greater than we ever knew existed because we have been limited by our invisible fence.

So what creates our fences? It is our life experiences – the events, conversations, school, traditions and beliefs that have created who we are at this exact moment. But none of these have to be true – they are just what we think are true. Like the dog with the collar that is afraid of the potential for shock, we stay away from things that we think, based on our assumptions, interpretations or limiting beliefs, will hurt or scare us.

What if instead we saw our world without fences – invisible or otherwise? What if we were to start to see that we have unlimited potential instead of being limited?

I truly believe we have the ability to be extraordinary in some things in life – things that we have previously told ourselves we shouldn’t even try, shouldn’t expect, or won’t succeed at. We are each gifted with unique talents, strengths and passions that allow us to be amazing at some things. To discover our areas of greatness, we must walk to our “fences” to see that there is no charge, no hurt – just some fear; in most cases we simply had a story about how it would be.

I was told how anxiety-provoking public speaking is. In fact, the story we tell ourselves is that we fear speaking in front of others more than death. So we perpetuate the “fence” – speaking is frightening. I truly felt that through all my years in school until I had to speak to my class. I loved it. It was easy for me. I understand that for some people it may be difficult but how do we know if we are afraid to approach our fences – our limits – and see whether they are true or imagined? Most of our fences we can move past – we just need to muster the courage to try.

A full and great life is about moving past our fences – our self-imposed limits. We start life with few if any fears; we then learn them as we move though life. Instead of trying things and pushing our limits, we learn to clearly define our limits, and once established, not challenge them. It may show as being raised in one particular faith and being afraid to quest for greater wisdom by investigating others. Or, that we are told that our tradition is to celebrate a holiday in a particular way, and we continue it year after year without ever trying something new. Or, we work in jobs that we don’t really like but are afraid to try our own business or work in roles that we are passionate about. We build fences to protect ourselves from the unknown. And the result is they limit how great our lives can be.

What a joy it is to run free in life – to be able to go in all directions – to try things out, examine life, and see what amplifies our spirits. Thirty-five percent of Americans openly admit that they never live their potential; they have built the fences that keep their lives small. They don’t run free. They worry. They fear. They think that coloring in the lines and living within the fences is the way to do life. That is actually more of a formula to miss out on life.

Just for today, challenge your fences. Most of them are imaginary. And instead of seeing fear, see your life without fences – without limitations – living your potential – changing your world. Then, with courage, inspire others to move past their fences.

Deepak Chopra: How Do We Relieve Existential Suffering?

We’ve all experienced the fear and pain that can come from considering our own demise. What is the meaning of life, and how do we rise above the uncertainty of it all? In this episode of “Ask Deepak” on The Chopra Well, Deepak Chopra discusses suffering related to our sense of identity in relation to the world – also known as existential suffering.

Does existential suffering arise from awareness of our mortality? What are the causes and how can we remedy this type of suffering? Looking at Vedantic traditions, Deepak’s list of five reasons that lead to existential suffering can be overcome by understanding that our fear is largely a projection of consciousness. True consciousness is an infinite field of creativity, much grander than the confines of our projected reality.

Subscribe to The Chopra Well and tell us your thoughts in the comments section below!

Wordplay Wednesday: Broken Open

treasurechest
I want to fall in love so that
I can write a love song
Gain access to the words
Explaining feelings
Lost inside
I want to be broken open
Like a treasure chest
At the bottom of the ocean
Releasing all my fears so that
All that’s left is light

I just wrote this the other day, and liked it so thought I’d share with you all:)

 

Past Wordplay Wednesdays:

Change

Please

Leaving

More

8 Ways To Feel Better In 30 Seconds Or Less

CL Society 194: Laughing girlPeople tell me, “I don’t have the time to …

“… go to the store and pick up fruits and vegetables.
“… exercise.” 
“… sit and breathe.”
“… to be positive.”

Really?  Too busy to be positive?

Surely, you can clear a scant 30 seconds to do something positive for yourself, can’t you? If thinking about what to do takes up too much of those 30 seconds, here follow 8 suggestions!

8 Positive things that you can ‘accomplish’ in a mere 30 seconds. 

  1. Breathe. 70% of waste is eliminated via your lungs! You can place your hand on your belly and feel it rise and fall with each breath cycle. Thirty seconds of breathing can do wonders!
  2. Affirmations. Repeat one powerful affirmation over and over again for 30 seconds. If it’s a short affirmation, “I am whole and complete,” you may be surprised to find how many times you can repeat “I am whole and complete” in just 30 seconds.
  3. Stretch. Stand and reach for the stars!
  4. Smile. Smiling relaxes hundreds of muscles and releases pockets of stress and tension held in your face.
  5. Stay Hydrated. Your brain is approximately 75% water, and it’s the first place in the body to lose water. Your brain needs water to think clearly. Drink a glass of water.
  6. Close Your Eyes. Give yourself a real break and allow your body a 30 second opportunity to re-balance itself. Close your eye, cup the palm of your hands over your ears and listen to the blissful sounds of the ocean playing. Just like when you were a kid and held that shell to your ear!
  7. Dance It Out. Plug your iPod into your ears and shake it up for 30 seconds. The ultimate energy boost!
  8. Do Nothing. Just sit and stare; perhaps out the window or at the ceiling. Just be sure to do nothing!

Surely, we all have a few 30-second pockets of time during the day where we can take the time to just be. Start NOW!

Spread the word … NOT the icing!

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Originally published July 2011

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