The True Opportunities to Express Love

 

The expression of love does not require a special holiday, particularly in a couple’s relationship. We have an opportunity to re-embrace and ignite the spark in our relationship several times a year, not just on major holidays, birthdays, Mother’s/Father’s Day, and other special occasions. We certainly recognize our partner’s achievement on Valentine’s Day, and traditionally express our love to our significant others by giving scripted cards and gifts. For a moment our relationship with our loved one feels re-energized. On this day, the opportunity to affirm our affection and feelings of affinity towards our significant others arrives, via a structurally set date on the calendar.

This occasion, Valentine’s Day, is also an opportunity for couples to reaffirm their commitment to one another, from rewriting their vows to finding various ways to celebrate each other and the relationship. Partners can reignite their passion and bring back the vitality into their union. While particular dates on the calendar reawaken the chance to express our love, many couples neglect those elements of the relationship during the rest of the year. Couples may take the relationship for granted and leave it vulnerable and untended.

So, why can’t every day become an opportunity to celebrate the relationship? Why do lovers need to wait or depend on a special occasion to express love to one another?

The "Ego 2 Heart" listening and communication practice for couples emphasizes the daily awareness to reach couples’ intimate connectedness. It supports a daily cultivation of the relationship through non-judgmental listening and communicating. The following are amongst some of the daily opportunities to express love and deepen your intimate bond.

  1. It is helpful to remember that our partner is the other half of self. When we communicate daily, positive affirmations, support and affection, it empowers our partner and strengthens the relationship.
  2. Remain mindful to give as much as we receive, talk as much as we listen and provide pleasure as much as we enjoy receiving it. It helps to explain our likes and dislikes, what makes us feel good, what turns us on. We need to share and encourage our partner to do the same.
  3. Giving your partner space and taking time for self individually can be energetically replenishing. We need to keep in mind the importance of surprise, humor, playfulness, spontaneity, adventure and creativity. Break the routine by exploring new places and activities together such as camping, traveling to an exotic place and spending time in nature.

These are only a few of the various opportunities to express love and deepen our relationships. Showing your vulnerability and expressing to your partner a heartfelt affirmation such as, “I want you to know how important you are to me in my life. Who you are makes the difference in my life," can further deepen your intimacy,

Dr. Moti Peleg & Ronit

For more information on Dr. Moti and Ronit Peleg, Ego 2 Heart workshops, their Oprah Show appearance and their upcoming book, “Destined Encounter,” go to www.ego2heart.org.

 

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About motiandronit

When Oprah Winfrey Show producer Hilary Jane Robe searched for couples for the show’s “Greatest Love Stories” she discovered a story about Dr. Moti and Ronit Peleg in a New Jersey newspaper. Not only are the Pelegs destiny-driven soul mates with an incredible love story, but they’re also humanitarians whose Ego to Heart workshops emphasize heartfelt listening and communication between other couples. It started when a 17-year-old boy became smitten with a magazine cover of the newly crowned Miss Israel of 1964 — Ronit Rinat. Moti said, “There was some kind of spirited glow in her.” He stressed her eyes beckoned to him, and he kept that photo, feeling they would someday marry. Meanwhile, Ronit married a physician from the United States at age 19, and had three children. “I went to college and opened an international store in Beverly Hills,” she said. But Ronit said her husband was neither a communicator nor spiritual. “We went to a workshop for couples called “Flesh & Spirit” and it was just what I was seeking: to be listened to without judgment, to be spoken to from the heart and, most of all, to listen to my own heart before I spoke.” She studied for five years under Dr. Jack Zimmerman and Dr. Jaquelyn McCandless, certified in the couples’ intimacy practice. She brought this counseling method back to Israel in 2002 and became the founder of “Council” in Israel. “Council” helps one openly explore, offer heartfelt expression and learn to listen attentively. It is said to be the gateway to intercultural understanding and the non-violent exploration of conflict. After her husband’s death, Ronit was empowered to continue with a full life. “I have trained, mentored, spread the practice all over the country (Israel),” she said, “it is recognized as a way to reduce violence in schools, empower women, men, and children — to build community and connect through dialogue between Arabs and Jews.” Simultaneously, Moti came to the States in 1970. He received his psychology degree from Queens College, got married and had two children. “Sadly, my wife and I didn’t have communication skills,” he said. “We struggled with fears and insecurities that eventually drew us apart and caused us to divorce.” Peleg completed his Doctorate at Yeshiva University, and has been a psychotherapist and psychologist for more than three decades, specializing in traumatic stress associated with pain and relationship issues. However, his desire to meet the girl with the eyes that seemed to signal him remained constant. So in 2004, a friend called Ronit to say he had someone who wished to meet her. At first, Ronit thought it was a joke, but realized this man’s voice seemed truthful. Moti communicated with Ronit via phone calls, e-mails, love letters and songs. “The lyrics and songs talked to my soul,” Ronit said. She flew to New York and visited Moti. For the first three hours of their visit, Ronit asked Moti to join her in “Council.” Ronit said, “We shared deep stories from our past, our childhood fears and dreams.” After two years, they were married. The “destined” couple combined their counseling methods to form “Ego to Heart”. The workshops enable people to listen to the “voice of the relationship,” thus eliminating the ego of “me,” transforming it to “we”, which diminishes the power of ego that reduces a heart’s connection,” according to the Pelegs. “The results of respect, humility and compassion, allowing a person to be seen as perfect in their imperfections, without judgment … empowers each one of us and the relationship,” Ronit added. They provided workshops in New Hope, but realized the location did not have the karma and warmth they sought. Once more, destiny called the Pelegs to the Hudson Valley, where Moti’s son, a construction engineer, came upon a place in Esopus. The 10,000-square-foot mansion with heart carvings throughout the structure overlooking the Hudson River was called “Heart’s Ease” and served as a labor school for newly arrived immigrants. By working with the Esopus Historical Society, the Pelegs’ research revealed that one of America’s greatest humanitarians, Eleanor Roosevelt served on the board of the labor school. Architectural heart-shaped appointments, the name “Heart’s Ease” and the grand humanitarian connection? This certainly seems like destiny. And if historical renovations and construction go as intended, by August 2011, the couple’s destiny will be fulfilled. For more information on Dr. Moti and Ronit Peleg, Ego to Heart workshops, the Oprah Show video and their upcoming book, “Destined Encounter,” go to www.ego2heart.org or call Moti Peleg’s office at (201) 652-6843.

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