When I was in my second year of college living on campus (at Columbia in NYC) with 4 suite mates, every time the phone rang, there was a race to answer it. Everyone wanted to be the guy to hear the “hello” on the other side just in case it was my friend Michael Jackson calling.
Most of those days, Michael was holed up on top of the Four Seasons, roughly 60 blocks away from where I lived on the upper Westside of Manhattan just near Harlem. I’d happily drift downtown, gain clearance from security downstairs who knew I was allowed free access to Michael’s suite, take the elevator all the way up and start ordering room service and watch movies on Mike’s tab. Eventually, Michael and I would get down to work. He was working on a new album and asked me to help him write lyrics for songs. It was an informal relationship – I’d wander downtown with a backpack full of dictionaries, and thesauri, and rhyming books. Michael would hum songs and talk about what he wanted to say with the song and we’d try and marry our skillsets and come up with something. We came up with great stuff. Michael swore me to secrecy those days. I happily complied.
After we were done with those sessions – they’d usually go until about 2 AM or so – Michael would wander into the bathroom and come out with a sack he’d pulled out from under the toilet. In it, he kept several thousands of dollars. He’d ask me how much I wanted. I just sort of shrugged and he’d hand me a couple of thousand dollars. Soon, I’d be packing my dictionaries and thesauri and rhyming books in my backpack, calling my friends and telling them to meet me downtown. Within an hour, we’d be at Flashdancers “making it rain.”
Michael was always envious when I told him about my adventures with my friends. More than a few times, he’d get dressed up – dawning some sort of quasi-disguise – preparing to go with me, only to back down at the last minute or be held back by his security who would shake their heads and plainly say no to his misguided ambitions. Instead, he’d pour himself a tall glass of orange juice and settle in for the night to watch an old movie on TV, telling me to spend a few extra bucks for him. I happily complied.
My friendship with Michael was very special to me, and I like to think it was the same for him. Over the last few years, it always felt awkward to explain the origins of our friendship – that I met him initially when I was fifteen-years-old and that we instantly hit it off. I’d spend days at his Neverland Ranch, my sister, cousins, or other friends joining us in fantastical stretches filled with candy, arcade rides, late night movies and the absolute best chocolate chip cookies of all times. Likewise he’d visit our house in Massachusetts (he was very close to my father as well) where he’d sleep in the guest room. My mom got a great kick out of the fact that every morning Michael stayed, he’d try to make the bed (very badly) and offer to cook breakfast (very badly). Then when I was about 17, Michael invited me on the road with him – he was heading out to Europe on the biggest rock concert at the time (Dangerous tour) and wanted company. I begged and pleaded with my parents to let me go and they eventually said yes. Not a bad way to spend your summer vacation between junior and senior year of Highschool.
Over the years, as Michael faced his scandals, I often reflected on my own experiences with him as a teenager. People would ask me if I had endured anything strange or awkward with him. I’d answer truthfully that in all of my years with him, in every single moment, Michael was nothing but dignified and appropriate, never once doing anything that would be deemed scandalous with me. It was really that simple.
Check that. Back to those college days. One night he did call me in a panic. He had just gotten married to Lisa Marie Presley and needed advice – sex advice. He was incredibly nervous and said that he wanted to make sure that Lisa was impressed with his “moves.” He asked me if I had any advice. I answered with one word: “foreplay.”
“Really?” He answered. “Girls really like that?”
Over the last few years, Michael’s and my relationship evolved and matured greatly too. We both became fathers and that was the centerpiece of our most recent conversations the last few months. Returning the favor from my days as his “lyrical advisor,” he’s the one who monikered my half-Indian, half-Chinese son “The Chindian” which little Krishu Chen Xing Hua Chopra will now forever go by. We’d talk about how great it would be for our kids to grow up together, become as good friends as us, and set the world on fire. Michael admired the fact that I was able to find a wife, keep a wife, and gain her trust. I’d joke it was all about the foreplay! When his daughter Paris befell an accident a few years ago, he called my wife Candice (a physician) pleading for us to come to his house to check her out.
We did – Paris had fallen from a tree and cut herself deeply beneath the eye. Michael was devastated and confessed to me that he felt like the world’s worst father. I calmed him as Candice helped Paris get up from the bed where she lay so we could take her to the Emergency room to get some simple stitches. When I advised Michael of the plan, he pulled me into the bathroom, pulled a sack filled with thousands of dollars from beneath the toilet and asked me how much I needed for the Emergency room.
I shook my head: “this one’s on me.”
RIP in peace my friend.
Gotham Chopra
Also read Deepak Chopra’s A Tribute to My Friend, Michael Jackson and Mallika Chopra’s Reflections on Growing Up with Michael Jackson
Flickr image by Current News Stories
dear gotham,
i can understand how much hurt you and deepak are after his shocking passing away ( i just stared at the screen and read twice to convince myself). may god bless you all and his family with peace and strength.
i also am one of them who did not believed those scandals, i just did not… cant explain the reason but i did not for a second.
i was first his fan then it transformed to deep sympathy when he finally gave in to excess tresspassing to his private life.
God bless his soul.
Wish you love, peace and happiness.
Trisha
I am so sorry for your loss. A great friend is an eternal treasure. Blessings to you and yours
Moving, great friend, great artist, Gotham you shared beautiful part of life with the king of pop. Peace to him.
Love
Rajesh
http://rajeshmsharma.blogspot.com
thank you Gotham for sharing that piece with us, thank you so much for sharing that part of Michael we knew was true and that he was just like all of us. This really put a smile on my face since i've been sad and in tears since i heard of his passing…My heart goes out to you, your amazing father, and family in the passing your friend Michael.
Yes, thank you for sharing the beautiful truth about Michael.
Thank you, Gotham, for taking the time in this mourning period of intense grief, to share your personal stories with reading Intent.
I have been immersed in the CNN coverage with constant regurgitations of his scandals, and a smattering of his brilliance.
Your story, and the story from your father, offer true insight into Michael as a man, and into his closest relationships.
Thank you so much and we are all so shocked and sorry to see him go.
Hi Gotham,
Watching Michael Jackson's performance on the Motown Special in 1982 with my children left us in awe of him as an entertainer and performer. That performance has to be one of the most exciting and exhilarating I have ever seen. Michael Jackson was stunning to watch, you couldn't take your eyes of him. I visited a friend once who was watching VH1 and Michael Jackson's Thriller video was playing and my friend said, "everytime this come on I have to sit at watch." This is how I will remember Michael. His performaces awed you.
I have missed seeing him perform and was looking forward to catching a glimpse of his upcoming tours through videos I am sad that I will not get to seem him doing what was his forte, great performances……..rann
I want to thank you and your father for helping me sort through my feelings about Michael.
Growing up and hearing his music he was up there with the best, then he seemed to get so wierd, I just didn't understand , I decided Michael had no one to give him a straight answer when he began to drift from the hard bones of reality, and so he drifted further into fantasy land, only his fantasy land was distorted, I'm talking about all of the surgery and cosmetics, Michael was fine just as he was , just too many yes men getting paid to tell him how great he was. I can only imagine how having to impress millions of people can leave you as fragile as the finest crystal, what a terrible price to pay for genius.
thankyou for the insight I once again open my heart to the beautiful spirit that was only trying to give.
Thank you very much for sharing this, I think we needed more of this during the times that all the lies were on the media.
Your testimony, as I think more like this would come out, its very important to give him credit, and make the good part of him, the loving part and the kind part prevail in all that media full of lies.
But also as I think this, whats the point to "clean" his name when all the people who really know him and care for him knew the loving person and good person he was??? I think its somehow useless.
MJ soul will rest now.
Thanks again.
This is what the world needed to hear yesterday, the truth of Micheal, his life and the way he was.
It's unfornuate we didn't hear these messages sooner. It's amazing to me how he was loved by millions but died as to what seems like a lonely man. I heard someone say on CNN last night how so many people are giving these swelling statements of Micheal, of how great they thought he was but where were they yesterday?
Again, thank you Gotham for your truth…. Micheals music & his message of unity and love will live for generations to come….
I agree with Toywa, and I thank you for sharing this with us. It humanizes Michael, which is certainly what he needed throughout his whole life. Not a god, he was human. Tremendously talented and gifted, yes, but as he himself said, he bled like anyone else.
It makes me deeply sad to think that he was unable to go out with you and your friends. It must have been like living in a prison with invisible bars.
Again, my thanks.
And I am so sorry for your loss, Gotham.
Always hope,
Lori
–
Lori Hope
Author
Wow! Beautiful, amazing story and tribute.
What a strange, sad and beautiful series of anecdotes. Thank you so much for giving the rest of us such an intimate and honest insight on such a misunderstood character.
Gotham,
Thank you so much for showing others this side of MJ.
I too have some wonderful memories of times spent at Neverland Ranch.
Where I would volunteer as a EMT when he had special needs kids there.
He will be missed.
Jeff Parker
><((((
So sorry for your loss and thank you for sharing this with us all. I am so amazed that Michael was such a huge part of your life and think it's incredible that you were blessed with him as a friend and will have those memories to cherish forever.
Thank you very much for share this truth with us. I've been so sad to see how the press -at least at my country,Spain- has been so cruel with Michael's death. I 've switch off the TV because I can't stand it.
This you shared is a ray of light between the darkness.A light that I need for keep my faith in humanity.
Really ,Gotham,Thank you.
Gotham,
My heart goes out to you, your family, Michael's family and all who are mourning their own personal loss.
It must have been difficult to write these words while the pain is still so fresh but I thank you sincerely for doing so.
There is so much misunderstanding and judgment in this world when it comes to public figures… forgetting that these people, just like everyone else, have personal lives, the right to privacy, dignity and respect. Stories develop and then they grow. The media is no help in rectifying the situation.
Your words and your father's are so very welcome at this time. I pray that they help to clear up some of the mystery and misconception.
Sending love, compassion and strength
~Pam
Thank you for your heart-filled words, Gotham.
His work here was complete. Now his sweet,
talented, joyous spirit can guide us. Bright blessings.
Thank you for sharing this intimate portrait of your friendship. Thank you for providing what so many of us who have "been involved" with him in our lives through his music and loved him for the gift he gave us to uplift and inspire us. Truth and a positive loving memory of a man who gave but never seemed to me to have found.
Peace to you
K
Hi Gotham,
Thank you for the nice post and sharing this with all of us. Have been a big fan of Michael Jackson and your dad. If you happen to visit washington DC do drop by at my restaurants – Indique and Indique Heights.
http://www.chefvinod.typepad.com
I'm sorry for your loss, Gotham. Somehow… I'm so grateful for the very special love you two shared. That's what truly makes the world go round, isn't it? And to think that no loss can take that away…
Thank you for sharing, and be well, dear one.
My deepest condolences to all that Mourn.
I had the privilege of meeting Michael Jackson at the Ma Maison restaurant in LA. He walked in and sat a few yards away from my table. At the time the "Thriller Album had been released and it was a massive hit, I waited outside the mens room for Michael to come out thinking about what I could say. As he passed me I called out "Mr Jackson" he jumped, Hi I am from England and I just wanted to thank you for the contribution that you have made to the world through your music." He was touched and thanked me.
When I went back to my table I kept a focus of sending him light (loving thoughts). As my dinner companion and I left the restaurant Michael stood up and bowed to us. It was a heartfelt memory that I shall never forget. Today when I heard the news of his death, "Ill be there" was playing on my car radio and I burst into tears, once again acknowledging how this man had touched so many lives through his music. My his souls jorney be blessed in the light.
RIP.
Thank you SO much for sharing this story… it's not just the gripping details that make it such a rich read, but the fact that it gives so much more dimension than any journalist could ever do. Not their fault, though, 'objectivity' loses much of the human factor when writing about any person, famous or not.
When these types of stories are told they help us remember that fame can be a prison the same way that it also grants the ability to inspire so many millions of people. This story is absolutely a valuable piece of history and we sincerely hope more people will read it – it would help make sense of the confusing information all over the net, television and everyday gossip.
Thank you again, you've improved the topic by being so frank
Sounds like a great "Guys" relationship!
Some normalcy for Michael in a world which offered him very little in the enjoyment of everyday things.
Thank you for sharing….and by the way ,your advice was "Right On"!
Namaste,
Debra
I hope the loving memories and kind words help bring peace to his soul… I too wish more people had heard these beautiful accounts earlier… but then everything would have been different, and that I suppose was not meant to be.
Peace to him, and thank you for sharing these very personal memories.
Gotham,
Thank you so much for having the strength to go beyond whatever pain you may be experiencing right now, and posting this beautiful tribute to your friend and our brother. This reaffirms to me how we are all connected within the realm of infinity.
I am sure he is so pleased and tickled, and loves you deeply for doing so.
love and peace to your essense,
Lia
Thank you, Gotham,
There were those of us who didn't borrow our opinions from the media, knowing somehow, that there were stories such as these that humanized him and felt for him, as easy as abc, 123 or as simple as do re mi.
With love, honor, and respect,
Starshine
Thank you Gotham, Michael will be smiling in heaven. The image of a bag of cash in a bathroom is such a bizarre, random, reminder of the surreal normality that Michael Jackson lived. My heart fills with warmth picturing his smiling face.
Milord Gotham (spoken from Intent's loyal resident Medieval-and-Renaissance Geek–smiles,
I want to thank you for sharing your experience. I was really touched by what you shared of Michael's reaction to his daughter falling from a tree–cleared up any doubts remaining in my mind that he could have molested any kid. I appreciate your sharing so candidly. Thank you. His spirit is lucky to have had friends like you and your dad and sis during his mortal life. Bless you.
Love,
Brigit
I just wanted to thank you so much for this heartfelt tribute, it touched my heart deeply. It is one of few tributes out there (along with your fathers and Lisa Marie Presley's) that show us what type of human being he actually was.
I never expected to feel so heartbroken as I do, the last time I felt this way was when Princess Diana died. I think I feel upset and angry at how society really crucifies some of the
nicest people it has. God bless him wherever he is and I am glad that people can't use him or abuse him anymore. After reading that his family is having such a hard time even obtaining his will and that his lawyers won't give them anything, its an unbelievable situation.
He shared such a beautiful gift with all of us, may good things come to him, thank you.
Hello Gotham,
It is nice of you to share your experiences with Michael to the world, but I am curious as to why you are sharing such private information. I am sure it is information you have kept private until now.
Your wrote,…Michael asked you to swear to secrecy of writing music with him. Did he ever give you permission to tell people? Just because he is dead does that mean his trust in you to hold secrets is no longer required as a friend?… I work with high profile people in both the music and film industry for the past 23 years and what I know of them will go to my grave. I have sworn secrecy with them, as well as it being my general work ethic which also means to me I keep secrecy always, alive or dead. It appears to me ego is taking over to show how significant you are by sharing such private details of your relationship with Michael. I may be mis-perceiving…
I also feel his phone call to you about sex with Presley is also something to have kept silenced. As interesting as it is to the public, I am not sure Michael would have appreciated that disclosure. I am not judging you by this particular blog but I wanted to share my thoughts and observation.
Your father's entry, comments and TV interviews about Michael I think are respectable and very much needed to clarify and reveal Michael's abuse of prescription drugs and Lupus condition along with his appropriate behavior with children but your comments seemed a bit too private (one on one) to make public.
Thank you for letting me share.
Gotham, may you have a peace that passes human understanding in your time of mourning and of this celebration of passage as Michael has now crossed the veil from the visible back into the invisible… his light shining now ever so bright as it did when his wick first lost its color of white. He has left behind his personal pain and the world his gift of joy!
Namaste'
Hi Gotham
Firstly, condolences to you for your loss.
Your blog was very touching, and my sense of personal loss increased ,reading about the innocence and simplicity that Michael was.
Like millions of fans in the world, I am still in shock, and denial that Michael Jackson is not more amongst us. He certainly had a connection with everyone which is why people felt that someone close to them had passed away.
I felt very angry about the torment he underwent, and the constrant scrutiny he was under throughout his life. I never believed that he could do the acts he as accused of. Its unfair that even after giving so mcuh to the world, he got negativity in return.
I remember listening to his albums and feeling really upbeat after that. The contribution he gave to music cannot be matched and his void can never be filled.And he is finally at peace in heaven. I am sure he will be very happy there.
You have been really privileged for being such good friends with such a lovely human being.All of us are with you at this time of grief.
God bless.
wow Gotham.. you've had an amazing childhood and college years with MJ! very lucky!
Dear Gotham. I saw you on MSNBC in your interview with Keith Olberman. I didn't know of you before.
Through your words, I got a feeling of what it must have been to be around Michael. Your heart is truly pure. I keep reading your truly disarming words. Every word you say is essential and your expressions are so mesmerizing.
I am not surprised that Michael chose you as his close friend and as the craftsman of his lyrics. I feel for the pain he had to endure during his life, but I hope you realize that to an outsider like me, your presence in his life, was part of the healing and love he received.
You are part of the reasons why Michael was able to deliver the beauty he created for us. I am sorry for your loss.
Michael was a threat, to the Status Quo, always was, and was going to be a big one with the new tour, and it did him in. The curse of fame is that it can be a magnet for the forces of ego.
Michael did not experience death, only we did. When the body has died then there is no longer anything to separate us from them, and they have become fully one with us. Closer than ever before. Although we are sad in that we can no longer engage him, we can still know him, Michael is alive in our mind, he is within us, as he always was, now longer without.
I suppose then it was Michael that posted a comment on this Intent Blog thread in 2005. A very potent thread.
What Does Jesus Mean By "Resist Not Evil?"
http://www.intentblog.com/archives/2005/12/what_d…
Dear Gotham,
I first read this on Huffington Post, and came to this site to respond to you.
The experiences you write about have a feeling of real authenticity. This is so rare in reading what most people say about Michael Jackson. I have always gotten the feeling that authentic and truly warm human relationships might be hard for him to find, as his life was so unusual. He seemed to me to be a very vulnerable person.
I feel relieved to know that there were some people around him who could be normal with him, who seemed to not just be trying to get something from him.
Thank you for your open-hearted writing about this. I believe it has made a great difference in how people perceive your friend. I think you have done him a real service.
Although I am extremely saddened by Michael's passing, I am happy that the world is finally getting a glimpse at the "real" Michael. He wasn't a weird, wacky man. He was a regular guy with normal fears, desires, and life experiences. Thank you for sharing a piece of the Michael you knew.
I heard about your blog from watching the coverage of Mike's death on CNN. I have to say that I am extremely moved by your entire family. The love you had for Michael is very apparent and I am so happy that you were in his life. I'm sure he loved you all as much as you loved him.
I think your blog and that of Lisa Marie (myspace) have probably been two of the most honest and heartfelt writings I have read since Michael's death. I hope you all can find some comfort in knowing that he is finally at peace.
Thank you again for sharing your heartwarming memories of Michael.
Dear Gotham,
I wanted to respond to the above poster regarding you breaking trust with Michael by sharing some of these confidences. I think that the public needs something to combat all of the negativity that is out there about Michael Jackson. He cannot be hurt by anything you have said, as it comes from a place of love and can only bring joy and comfort to those of us who love him – and maybe give pause to those who seek to condemn a man they cannot understand. Sure, the sex thing is intimate but harmless nonetheless.
Michael is released from all worry and fear of rejection. Its time the world got to know him just a little. And I am grateful that you have shared this. Thank you.
http://tinyurl.com/nnvrw6
Dear Gotham,
I also send condolences to you. In this time it is very important that we talk about the things considering Michael which help us all to handle the shocking passing. To me, it's important to show my respect towards Michael and his talent. I'm collecting every song he produced for my children and the coming generations to keep Michael's voice alive. Currently I'm auctioning the Platium Award of Thriller.
My deepest condolences to the Chopra family for the loss of your dear friend Michael Jackson.
I have to admit that I was one of those people who was convinced that MJ was guilty of what he was accused of. I was also one of the many people who probably "made fun" of him, or something he did – never quite understanding the frenzy around him either. But since his death, I started to think… what if maybe he didn't do what he was accused of; I didn't really know; nor did I know him. And eventhough this makes me a hypocrite, I started feeling a sadness, not only for the loss but for a life lived in a lot pain – a destructive, lonely, sad life… so it seemed. It's also sad that it takes someones death to see that you were making hurtful judgments – and that you couldn't find compassion for someone who clearly had his problems and was suffering in life. I have also however asked myself the question- are my emotions actually genuine, because I never really was a Michael Jackson fan – never denying his talent though – and only knew him as a mega pop star- didn't really give him much thought – and was wondering if I hadn't just been caught up in the whole "critical mass" phenomena. I hope my emotions are genuine – and my compassion and sorrow are not only for a pop icon, but a fellow human being. What does it matter anyway, that I didn't know him personally – after all, everyone is ultimately connected to each other.
Sorry MJ!
Be at Peace.
Many thanks
Love Tarryn
Dear Gotham,
Have you seen the interview?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EZnrxk-dpVA
Is this the Michael Jackson you know? A pure and beautiful angel sent by God.
I hope the Jackson Memorial Service will include this interview, it will have profound impact on people's understanding of Michael Jackson.
This is a wonderfully sweet and genuine tribute to someone that you obviously cared deeply about.
However; the almost-was-an-English major in me has to ask: Isn't it donning, not dawning? As in "Donning a quasi-disguise" instead of "dawning a quasi-disguise?"
Sorry, incredibly nitpicky, and it in no way takes away from the emotional impact of your post. I just had to be THAT annoying person and point it out.
Your story gives us a little view behind the person Michael.. but I do not understand why you have to write something extremely personal as his insecurity regarding sexual things with his ex-wife Lisa.
Would YOU like the world to know that a very confidential personal phonecall to a good friend would come literally in the media days after your death?
You would have never written this ( i hope) while Michael was living.
Is integrity suddenly less important when someone dies?
I dont like it. Thats between Michael and you and as a friend you should respect that.
I had to say this.
Sabina, Netherlands
I am in agreement with some of your critics here. While I appreciated you sharing some memories of Mike that helped people to get beyond their judgmental perspective about such a beautiful human being, when I read the post I was very disheartened about the information about Lisa Marie. Quite honestly I don't really believe it. However shy and isolated he may have been I strongly doubt that he came to a teenager for advice on what women want sexually. If you made this up you should be ashamed of yourself. If it is true, it is a deep betrayal of confidence, regardless of whether your friend has passed away. This is what he dealt with his whole life, everyone selling him out. I hope you can see that this is unethical. However we all make mistakes. But I just had to call you out on this. Please think about what you would want revealed next time you reveal such a deeply private conversation.
Best Regards
You and your dad say you were MJ's friend for years … if so, you knew about the drugs. Your dad admits he knew about the drugs on national TV. He's now in hiding it seems. Your dad probably enabled. Even so, you did nothing. You were no friend. Just another person whoring off of MJ's fame. Shame on you and your moralizing father.
Dear Gotham,
I only met Michael once, and let me tell you he left an impression on me. Only two people have made me feel this way. My 90 year old Navajo grandmother who is very spiritual and still lives out on the reservation by herself and Mr. Michael Jackson. It's like they have a powerful presence and a great force follows them, I'm not crazy, I felt there presence.
My grandmother is luckily still alive and well and I look forward to being in her presence. I was hoping to meet Michael a second time and unfortunately that never happened. I have honestly dreaded the days of either of them passing and it happened to Michael. I luckily still have my grandmother but with Michael gone, I understand the void.
Is as is.
You were fortunate to know Mr. Jackson as your friend. Once the tabloids can’t invent more dirt I trust that what is important-his contribution- will emerge untainted. It’s hard to judge if some details should remain private or be shared in public.
May his soul find freedom and peace.
Astrea
How can I email Gotham Chopra… or what is an address I can send him something?
-Ellen
I’m sure Michael never intended for you to repeat the very intimate, private phone conversation concerning Lisa-Marie. I think it lacks integrity and should not have been published. Did you give a thought to Lisa-Marie? Tisk, Tisk. I think we all would have been happy enough with your other reflections. To my knowledge Michael didn’t believe in sex outside of marriage. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that he was a virgin, [ and good for him] but it’s no ones business anyway. I personally would not ever repeat something like that, whatever my relationship with the person was.